Mai Janta Hoon Meri Humnafas..!!

[nirbhay]

This is already posted in dard section, this time a bit modified and rectified too.!!

Armano Ki kabar ko kuredtey kuredtey, dil mein Jeene ka ek farmann aata hai
Gar Zindagi Teri Zulfon ki narm choun mein guzar jaati, to muhabaat meri ho bhi sakti thi

Ye rang Jo gum ki shyahi meri kalam per chayi hai, ye Muhabaat mein tabdeel ho bhi sakti thi,
Aapne pyar ki Taswir Jo gardish mein Dhundhlayi hai, teri Nazron ki Shuaon mein kho bhi sakti thi.

Par aaisa ho na saka, mai tere sath hokar kahin, muhbaat ki rahon mein kho na saka.
Parrr aaisa kuch hona saka aaur abb ye aalam hai...
key too nahi tera Ghum nahi, tere Yaadein aaur teri Gftgu bhi nahi
Basar kar loonga zindagi kahin abb kisi ke sahare ki aarzu bhi nahi

Na koi raah muhabaat ki, namanzil ki tamana, jeeta hoon kuiki ek roshni ka suraag hai baaki kahin
Na bhatkunga keh abb bhatakne se yeh roshni ka suraag bhi bhatak jayega kahin.

Mai Jaanta hoon meri humnafas, Keh mujhmein ye roshni muhabaat bann kar nahi basegi kahin
Magar yoon hi armano ki kabar ko kuredtey kuredtey, dil mein Jeene ka ek farmann aata hai!!!

[Karan.sri]

Great, Nirbhay! Ek dam bindaas shayri hay bhai...

Par jyada serious mat hona...hume jis se prem tha vo na mil saki to kya hua...kisi ko hum se bhi to prem ho sakta hay...uske saath nibha dena...

If you have got ability to Love, you would be able to love anyone...

[vikas2210]

Nirbhay

Bahut hi accha likha hai tumne par bahut udaas aur nirasha se bhara hai.  kaya hua jo wo saath nahi tumhare.  Tumhe padh kae aisa lagta hai jaise bahut ummed thi tumhe par kahin kuch chuut gaya lagta hai.

Aur meri mano to apne armano ko kahi bhi kabar mai mat dalna abhi to jeete hao mar bhi gaye to tumhare arman aur kiye gaye kaam hi ti tumhari yaad ban kar rahenge is sansaar mai.

take care dear and keep the sprit going high..

[badnaam_shayar]

Nibhay bahut khoob likha hai tumne...........aise lagta hai jaise ek ek shabd ansoon k dhaage me piro diye ho.........well agar aaj koi saath nahi ya kisi ne aaj saath nahi dia toh koi baat nahi.......hum agli baazi chalenge.......par iss baar hum apni taqdeer badlenge... :wink: ..........

[iAdmin]

No personal comments over here,
This is not the way we want it to be.

The author will first post poem and then Users are invited to give their views in details, if you don't have time then don't do it, short reviews or "its good" like things are not expected here.

Give explanation your way but not taking poet in personal, just see poem.

[nirbhay]

Dont worry Dear Admin!

We will certainly be friendly wid d norms of d section may be slowly but surely, however its new for everyone now.

[roshni246]

EDITED by Yoindia Admin
Reason: :Only explanation , review with critics allowed. No short appreciation .

[Talat]

Nirbhay ! What i got after reading your poem is that you have written about one sided love ! The light which you are talking about is your love for the person that gives courage to you to carry on your life !!!! Though you are hopeless now, but somewhere there is still some hope that you will get your love !!

[nirbhay]

Hello Talat !

I do agree with your review and i do not too.

Nirbhay ! What i got after reading your poem is that you have written about one sided love !

Par aaisa ho na saka, mai tere sath hokar kahin, muhbaat ki rahon mein kho na saka.
Parrr aaisa kuch hona saka aaur abb ye aalam hai...
key too nahi tera Ghum nahi, tere Yaadein aaur teri Gftgu bhi nahi
Basar kar loonga zindagi kahin abb kisi ke sahare ki aarzu bhi nahi

Here the poet (me) has mentioned clearly that however love was from both side but bcz of unexpected & unavoidable circumstances they cud'nt decided there way together and since the poet is informed that his love is no more going to be beloved of him ............... he has decided to make his own destiny ALONE!!

Hope rules are not been broken!

[ranjeet_rp]

this poem is inspired by the work of sahir ludhianwi which is a song in film kabhi kabhi or silsila.poet has changed the original poem according to his requirement of feeling.in this poem his own originality also works well.

poet has killed his own wishes of living with his beloved and living like an alive dead........i think this is the main theme of the poem.he is not optimist about future.

[pinky]

Great Nirbhay!!

The Creation reminds of Kabhi-Kabhi..
But has a new touch to it..

It explains all you feel in the right way.
i wish you good luck and keep up the good work.

[harshit101]

I DONT KNOW WAT IS HAPPENING HERE.I HAVE HEARD
 THIS POETRY ATLEAST 1000 TIMES SINCE MY CHILDHOOD.
THIS IS FROM AMITABH BACHAN MOVIE WID RAKHI.I HAVE A CASSATE WID ME N I HEAR THIS ATLEAST TWICE A WEEK

[deepika_divya]

nice feeling.. bahut achi tarah se apni feelings ko tumne lafso mein utaara hai... its kind of feeling which u expressed its all depends on faith.. ki kis tarah tumhe pyar milta hai tumhe har khushi har rango se wakif karata hai.. fir barbas hi woh tumse itna dur chala jata hai ki sir f umeed ki ak choti si kiran hi reh jaat i hai aur wakt rehte rehte woh bhi ........

nice lines & really easy to understand ur feeling....