MANAGEMENT LESSONS

by TOUCHY on July 24, 2005, 01:26:05 AM
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TOUCHY
Guest
~*~^~*~^~*~^~*~^~
Lesson Number One
~*~^~*~^~*~^~*~^~
 
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I  
also sit like you and do nothing all day long?"

The crow answered, "Sure, why not."

So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and
rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on
the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson Number One:
-------------------------------
TO BE SITTING AND DOING NOTHING, YOU MUST BE SITTING
VERY, VERY HIGH UP.
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TOUCHY
Guest
«Reply #1 on: July 24, 2005, 01:27:12 AM »
~*~^~*~^~*~^~*~^~
Lesson Number Two
~*~^~*~^~*~^~*~^~
 
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to
be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the
turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."

"Well, why don't you nibble on  some of my
droppings?" replied the bull.
"They're packed with nutrients."

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that
it actually gave him enough strength to reach the
first branch of the tree.

The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached
the second branch. Finally after two weeks, there he
was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon
he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the
turkey out of the tree.

Management Lesson Number Two:
--------------------------------
BULLSHIT MIGHT GET YOU TO THE TOP, BUT IT WON'T KEEP
YOU THERE.
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TOUCHY
Guest
«Reply #2 on: July 24, 2005, 01:29:19 AM »
~*~^~*~^~*~^~*~^~
Lesson Number Three
 ~*~^~*~^~*~^~*~^~
 
When the body was first made, all the parts wanted
to be Boss.  The  brain said, "I should be Boss
because I control the whole body's responses and
functions."

The feet said, " We should be Boss as we carry the
brain about and get him to where he wants to go."

The hands said, "We should be the Boss because we do
all the work and earn all the money.

And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs
and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up.  All
the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the
Boss. So the asshole went on strike, locked itself
up and refused to work.

Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands
clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began
to panic and the brain fevered.

Eventually they all decided that the asshole should
be the Boss, so the motion was passed.

All the other parts did all the work while the Boss
just sat and passed out the shit!
 
Management Lesson Number Three:
----------------------------------
YOU DON'T NEED BRAIN TO BE A BOSS - ANY ASSHOLE WILL
DO.
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TOUCHY
Guest
«Reply #3 on: July 24, 2005, 01:31:05 AM »
~*~^~*~^~*~^~*~^~
Lesson Number Four
~*~^~*~^~*~^~*~^~
 
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It
was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in
a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by
and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay
there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize
how
warm it was.
The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there
all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
 
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to
investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered
the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug
him out and ate him!
 
Management Lesson Number Four:
--------------------------------
1) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your ENEMY.
2)Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your
   FRIEND.
3) And when you're in deep shit, KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT!
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TOUCHY
Guest
«Reply #4 on: July 30, 2005, 01:19:48 AM »
:cry:  :cry:  :cry:  :cry:

no one is interested in learning management lesson :cry:  :cry:  :cry:  :cry:  :cry:
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Suhas
Guest
«Reply #5 on: July 30, 2005, 05:38:36 AM »
................................................. :thumb:
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isha_verma7
Guest
«Reply #6 on: July 30, 2005, 06:20:15 AM »
1) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your ENEMY.
2)Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your
FRIEND.

So agreed...........good good!!!!
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TOUCHY
Guest
«Reply #7 on: July 31, 2005, 01:04:01 AM »
Quote from: "isha_verma7"
1) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your ENEMY.
2)Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your
FRIEND.

So agreed...........good good!!!!


Thank u so much Suhas jI and Isha ji..................
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