Mere khwabo ke choukhat par, deewana doudta aaye

by livingbytheday on August 10, 2012, 07:53:18 PM
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livingbytheday
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Na jaane koun se kissey sunaakar raat fuslaaye
Mere khwabo ke choukhat par, deewana doudta aaye

Nigaahon ko beechakar raastey mein raat din baithey
Wo dariyaa hain mohabatt ka, usey meri pyaas dikh jaaye

Koi  hadh hi nahi hain, ishq waalo ke iraado ka
Yehi bas josh e koshish hain, mohabatt faailati jaaye

Bus ab yeh zidd si  hain, ussey zuda hokar nahi jeena
Bane wo humsfar mera, ya safar hi haath se jaaye

Bahut khusboo bhikherey hain, naye mausam ne aatey hi
Kahin yeh jaate jaate hoton ki muskaan na le jaaye

Udaasi ke minaaro ko chalo hanskar giraa de aaj
Subah kal ki, umeedo ke naye gulshan khilaa jaaye

Geeli umeed haathon par sajaakar chahti hogi
Heena jub sukhkar nikle toh rekhayen badal jaaye

“Deepak” na reh banker ke tu na mumkin si hasrat
Kahin yun na ho dil se tera armaan nikal jaaye
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nandbahu
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«Reply #1 on: August 11, 2012, 01:15:04 AM »
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बहुत अच्छा
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soudagar
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«Reply #2 on: August 11, 2012, 03:16:56 AM »
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bahut khub deepak ji bahut hi umda qalaam.......


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khamosh_aawaaz
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«Reply #3 on: August 11, 2012, 06:10:20 AM »
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Quote from: livingbytheday on August 10, 2012, 07:53:18 PM
Na jaane koun se kissey sunaakar raat fuslaaye
Mere khwabo ke choukhat par, deewana doudta aaye

Nigaahon ko beechakar raastey mein raat din baithey
Wo dariyaa hain mohabatt ka, usey meri pyaas dikh jaaye

Koi  hadh hi nahi hain, ishq waalo ke iraado ka
Yehi bas josh e koshish hain, mohabatt faailati jaaye

Bus ab yeh zidd si  hain, ussey zuda hokar nahi jeena
Bane wo humsfar mera, ya safar hi haath se jaaye

Bahut khusboo bhikherey hain, naye mausam ne aatey hi
Kahin yeh jaate jaate hoton ki muskaan na le jaaye

Udaasi ke minaaro ko chalo hanskar giraa de aaj
Subah kal ki, umeedo ke naye gulshan khilaa jaaye

Geeli umeed haathon par sajaakar chahti hogi
Heena jub sukhkar nikle toh rekhayen badal jaaye

“Deepak” na reh banker ke tu na mumkin si hasrat
Kahin yun na ho dil se tera armaan nikal jaaye



naaaaaaaaaaice Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley
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Asif samani jaunpuri
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«Reply #4 on: August 11, 2012, 07:44:22 AM »
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Bahut bahut khoobsurat deepak ji APPKE PAS WAQT HUA KARE TO HAMARE KALAMO PE HI RAY DE DIYA KARE
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~Hriday~
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kalam k chalne ko zamaana paagalpan samajhta hai.

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«Reply #5 on: August 11, 2012, 11:03:48 AM »
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Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause  bahut khoob deepak ji....!!!
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #6 on: August 12, 2012, 12:58:25 PM »
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Quote from: nandbahu on August 11, 2012, 01:15:04 AM
बहुत अच्छा

shukriyaa
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #7 on: August 12, 2012, 12:59:08 PM »
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Quote from: soudagar on August 11, 2012, 03:16:56 AM
bahut khub deepak ji bahut hi umda qalaam.......


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thank you
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #8 on: August 12, 2012, 12:59:46 PM »
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Quote from: khamosh_aawaaz on August 11, 2012, 06:10:20 AM
naaaaaaaaaaice Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley

thank you
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #9 on: August 13, 2012, 08:19:46 AM »
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Quote from: Asif samani jaunpuri on August 11, 2012, 07:44:22 AM
Bahut bahut khoobsurat deepak ji APPKE PAS WAQT HUA KARE TO HAMARE KALAMO PE HI RAY DE DIYA KARE

zaroor koshish karunga sir, waise main khud likhne ki koshish kar raha hu, meri ray shayad aapke utna kaam nahi aaye. lekin aapne mujhe iss layak samjha ki aapko feedback de saku, uss ke liye shukriyaa...
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #10 on: August 13, 2012, 08:22:48 AM »
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Quote from: ~Hriday~ on August 11, 2012, 11:03:48 AM
Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause  bahut khoob deepak ji....!!!

thank you
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sksaini4
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«Reply #11 on: August 13, 2012, 09:01:00 AM »
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thoda singular plural kaadhyaa takkhe singular ke saath HAI use karen plural ke saathHAIN use karen keep it up
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #12 on: August 13, 2012, 05:03:46 PM »
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Quote from: sksaini4 on August 13, 2012, 09:01:00 AM
thoda singular plural kaadhyaa takkhe singular ke saath HAI use karen plural ke saathHAIN use karen keep it up

thank you sir for the feedback, will get it corrected
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suman59
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«Reply #13 on: August 13, 2012, 09:55:37 PM »
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bahut bahut khoob  Applause Applause
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #14 on: August 14, 2012, 01:55:58 PM »
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Quote from: suman59 on August 13, 2012, 09:55:37 PM
bahut bahut khoob  Applause Applause

suman ji bahut bahut shukriyaa
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