Samudra ka uchaal dekh, tairane ka khayal dekh

by livingbytheday on July 07, 2012, 05:54:34 PM
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livingbytheday
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Samudra ka uchaal dekh, tairane ka khayal dekh
Aandhee ke aaghosh mein, jal rahi  mashaal dekh

Tejh hawa kya chali, wo thoda ucha ud gaya
Suraj todne chala , Parinde ki majaal dekh

Seedhe seedhe chalne wale, tedhe tedhe chal rahe
Kamyaabi ke nashe mein, behak rahi chaal dekh

Ek kadam pada galat, qaid ho gaye hain hum
Hur tafar failaa hua, shikaariyo ka jaal dekh

Shehro ke sab raaste kya aane lage gaon tak
Pathar ban gaye nageene, mouko ka kamaal dekh

Jawaan wo tha “bhagat”, desh pe kurbaan hua
Ab bhi duniya de rahi hain, uski hi misaal dekh

Faake pan mein zindagi, kal pe hans kar taal di
Do din ke aaraam mein, gujar gaya hain saal dekh
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mkv
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«Reply #1 on: July 07, 2012, 06:23:15 PM »
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Bahut khoob
Applause Applause Applause
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Iftakhar Ahmad
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«Reply #2 on: July 07, 2012, 07:02:04 PM »
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Bahut hi khoob Deepak bhai, behtareen aur lajawaab. Bahut maza aaya padh ke.
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Aarish
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«Reply #3 on: July 08, 2012, 12:57:50 AM »
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Kya baat hai deepak jee bohot umda ghazal kahi hai , lajwab, sirf wah wah hi nikal rahi hai dil se , aur matale ka to jawab hi nahi, bas ek chooti si baat kehna chahunga lafz mazaal jo aapne likha hai wo lafz majaal hai,,, aur

Ek kadam padi galat, qaid ho gaye hain hum..  is line me lafz padi nahii hona chahiye tha yahan pada hona chaiye tha...  ye meri niji rai hai baqi aap zyada jaante hai mujh se... agar meri baat ghalat ho to gustakhi k liye muafi.....
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sksaini4
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«Reply #4 on: July 08, 2012, 01:49:11 AM »
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waah waah deepak ji kamaal kar diyaa aapne aapkee khidmat men ek rau pesh kartaa hoon
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #5 on: July 08, 2012, 02:30:19 AM »
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Bahut khoob
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thank you sir
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #6 on: July 08, 2012, 02:30:59 AM »
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Bahut hi khoob Deepak bhai, behtareen aur lajawaab. Bahut maza aaya padh ke.

iftakhar ji bahut bahut shukriyaa
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #7 on: July 08, 2012, 02:32:55 AM »
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Kya baat hai deepak jee bohot umda ghazal kahi hai , lajwab, sirf wah wah hi nikal rahi hai dil se , aur matale ka to jawab hi nahi, bas ek chooti si baat kehna chahunga lafz mazaal jo aapne likha hai wo lafz majaal hai,,, aur

Ek kadam padi galat, qaid ho gaye hain hum..  is line me lafz padi nahii hona chahiye tha yahan pada hona chaiye tha...  ye meri niji rai hai baqi aap zyada jaante hai mujh se... agar meri baat ghalat ho to gustakhi k liye muafi.....

aarish ji, thank you so much for the feedback, is manch ka yehi advantage hain ki hum apni writings ko app logo ke feedback se sudhar aur nikhar sakte hain, bahut bahut shukriyaa
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #8 on: July 08, 2012, 02:35:02 AM »
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waah waah deepak ji kamaal kar diyaa aapne aapkee khidmat men ek rau pesh kartaa hoon

Saini sir, aap se appreciation milta hain toh lagta hain, kuch theek thaak likha hain maine, izzat ada karne ke liye shukriyaa sir
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F.H.SIDDIQUI
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«Reply #9 on: July 08, 2012, 07:45:14 AM »
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bahut bahutkhubsurat peshkash .tah e dil se daad . HASAN
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #10 on: July 08, 2012, 01:57:32 PM »
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bahut bahutkhubsurat peshkash .tah e dil se daad . HASAN

bahut bahut shukryaa sir
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ParwaaZ
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«Reply #11 on: July 09, 2012, 04:25:06 PM »
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Deepak Jee Aadaab!


WaaH jee waaH kia kahne janab waaH gazab kar diyaa ... behad
umdaa khayaaloN ke khazaane se is kalaam ko malaamaal kar
diyaa... Usual Smile

Sabhi ashaaroN meiN gazab ki gehrai aur umdaa pan hai janab..
badi hi khoob kalaam kahi hai... Humari dheroN dili daad O
mubbarakbad kabul kijiye... Usual Smile

Likhate rahiye... aate rahiye...
Shaad O aabaad rahiye...

Khuda Hafez... Usual Smile                   

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«Reply #12 on: July 10, 2012, 10:15:27 AM »
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bohat khoob
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jasbirsingh
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«Reply #13 on: July 10, 2012, 10:32:54 AM »
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wah wah wah... bahut khoob ji ...


jasbir singh
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livingbytheday
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«Reply #14 on: July 11, 2012, 02:29:55 PM »
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Deepak Jee Aadaab!


WaaH jee waaH kia kahne janab waaH gazab kar diyaa ... behad
umdaa khayaaloN ke khazaane se is kalaam ko malaamaal kar
diyaa... Usual Smile

Sabhi ashaaroN meiN gazab ki gehrai aur umdaa pan hai janab..
badi hi khoob kalaam kahi hai... Humari dheroN dili daad O
mubbarakbad kabul kijiye... Usual Smile

Likhate rahiye... aate rahiye...
Shaad O aabaad rahiye...

Khuda Hafez... Usual Smile                   



parwaaz ji aapke shabdo se aur accha likhne ki chahat hoti hain, bahut bahut shukriyaa sir
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