tumko haq hai........

by sana Afroz on November 17, 2014, 01:21:05 AM
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sana Afroz
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Tumko haq hai ke tum  jalaal karo
   apni hasti ka kuch khayaal kara..

kuch to mujh par bhi rahm dikhlao,
   yun na nazron se tum halaal karo..

jantey ho jawab sarey tum ,
   ban ke anjaan mat sawaal karo..

mujhpe ilzam haiin  sabhi aayed .
   tum jo chahey karo kamaal karo..

mujhko milta hai ye jawab  'sana'
   chup bhi ho jaao !! Mat sawaal karo..
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sksaini4
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«Reply #1 on: November 17, 2014, 01:29:15 AM »
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waah waah
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mann.mann
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«Reply #2 on: November 17, 2014, 04:43:29 AM »
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 Applause Applause Applause

bahut khub sanaji........ umda
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sana Afroz
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«Reply #3 on: November 17, 2014, 05:45:17 AM »
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Shukriya shukriyaaa!!!!! Sksaini aur mann.mann ji
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Advo.RavinderaRavi
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«Reply #4 on: November 17, 2014, 05:55:32 AM »
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Bahut khoob.
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vb
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«Reply #5 on: November 17, 2014, 07:49:33 AM »
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Quote from: sana Afroz on November 17, 2014, 01:21:05 AM
Tumko haq hai k tum malaal karo
   apni hasti ka kuch khayaal kara..

kuch to mujh par bhi rahm dikhlao,
   yun na nazron se tum halaal karo..

jantey ho sabhi jawab jo tum ,
   ban ke anjaan mat sawaal karo..

mujhpe to jurm sabhi aayed hain.
   tum jo chahey karo kamaal karo..

jawab paya jo manga hisab lamhon ka,
   chup bhi ho jaao !! Mat sawaal karo..


Mohtarma sana Afroz sahiba! salam

buhat khoob.. daad haazir hay...

maqta'a ka pehla misra.. wazan men nahi hay... ye kuch esay bhi ho sakta hay.. (yaad rahay k hum tajveez sirf misra k wazan k havalay se detay hen, shayara ka mutafiq hona zaroori nahi)

"hum ne paaya hisaab lamhon ka"

... aik baar phir bharpoor daad k sath

dua-go
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sana Afroz
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«Reply #6 on: November 17, 2014, 07:58:31 AM »
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Shukriya. VB shb

mujhe bhi ye bhe mein nahin lag rha tha lekin maqsad wazeh nhin ho rha th kisi aur tarah ,isliye aise hi de diya. Mashware k liye mashkoor hoon.
duago...
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SURESH SANGWAN
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«Reply #7 on: November 17, 2014, 09:17:34 AM »
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 Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause icon_flower
sana ji bahut khooob....
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sbechain
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«Reply #8 on: November 17, 2014, 09:42:09 AM »
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Quote from: sana Afroz on November 17, 2014, 01:21:05 AM
Tumko haq hai k tum malaal karo
   apni hasti ka kuch khayaal kara..

kuch to mujh par bhi rahm dikhlao,
   yun na nazron se tum halaal karo..

jantey ho sabhi jawab jo tum ,
   ban ke anjaan mat sawaal karo..

mujhpe to jurm sabhi aayed hain.
   tum jo chahey karo kamaal karo..

hamko milta hai ye jawab  'sana'
   chup bhi ho jaao !! Mat sawaal karo..


mashaallah kya kahne ab kya sawwal karo.n iss pyaari ghazal pe buss rau deti hoon ji icon_flower icon_flower icon_flower icon_flower
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sana Afroz
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«Reply #9 on: November 17, 2014, 09:45:54 AM »
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shukriya  SHEBA JI ...
hausla afzai k liye mashkoor hoon.
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jeet jainam
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«Reply #10 on: November 17, 2014, 09:50:38 AM »
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 Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause
 Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause
bohut bohut khubsurat rachna waaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh dherooooooooo daaaaaaaaaadddddd
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sana Afroz
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«Reply #11 on: November 17, 2014, 09:57:32 AM »
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shukriya jeet ji...
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qadeer_junaid
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«Reply #12 on: November 17, 2014, 12:29:25 PM »
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Mahutram Sana sahibah ..aadab ..choti bhr me sher kahna mushkil hai hai taham aapne ache sher nikale hain ...zindabad ...dad o mubarak baad hazir hai ..

mujhpe to jurm sabhi aayed hain.
tum jo chahey karo kamaal karo..

darje bala sher ka misra e oola bhr se kharij hai ....lafz hain ko lafz sabhi se pahle kar len thik ho jayega ..

Mujhpe to jurm hain sabhi aayed..

jantey ho sabhi jawab jo tum ,
ban ke anjaan mat sawaal karo..

is sher ka misra e oola yun bhi ho sakta hai ..

tumko maaloom hain jawab sabhi
ban ke anjaan mat sawal karo ..


baaqi aap bahtar jaanti hain ...Ek baar dad hazir hai aapki is tilism angez ghazal ke huzoor ..

dua go

qadeertoopchi
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«Reply #13 on: November 17, 2014, 12:40:46 PM »
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Quote from: qadeer_junaid on November 17, 2014, 12:29:25 PM
Mahutram Sana sahibah ..aadab ..choti bhr me sher kahna mushkil hai hai taham aapne ache sher nikale hain ...zindabad ...dad o mubarak baad hazir hai ..

mujhpe to jurm sabhi aayed hain.
tum jo chahey karo kamaal karo..

darje bala sher ka misra e oola bhr se kharij hai ....lafz hain ko lafz sabhi se pahle kar len thik ho jayega ..

Mujhpe to jurm hain sabhi aayed..

jantey ho sabhi jawab jo tum ,
ban ke anjaan mat sawaal karo..

is sher ka misra e oola yun bhi ho sakta hai ..

tumko maaloom hain jawab sabhi
ban ke anjaan mat sawal karo ..


baaqi aap bahtar jaanti hain ...Ek baar dad hazir hai aapki is tilism angez ghazal ke huzoor ..

dua go

qadeertoopchi

Mohtaram janab qadeertoopchi sahab! salam

achha hay k aap bhe dekh letay hen.. hamari nazer say chook ho jati hay... aur fanni mahaarat aur tajurbaa men bhi kami hay...

baqol shakhsay...

baarhaa raah se bhatakta hun
aadmi hoon, khuda nahi, yaaro!

.....
misra men tabdeeli ki taraf ayay he hen tu ek cheez ye bhi dekh letay hen k "jurm" aayd nahi hota.. ya tu "fard-e-jurm" aayed hoti hay... ya phir "ilzaam" so esay bhi keh saktay hen..

Mujhpe ilzaam hain sabhi aayed..


dua-go
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qadeer_junaid
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«Reply #14 on: November 17, 2014, 12:52:27 PM »
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VB sahab aap sahi kah rahe hain ...zubaan ki barikiyun per baat ki jaaye to ghazal ka koi aisa misra nahi jis per baat karne ki gunjaaish nahi ...jaise ke aapne kaha ye kalame insaani hai kalame ilahi nahi jo har aib se paak ho ....aapka tabsera haq ba jaanib hai usko nakarna jihalat ki nihsani hai ......maine sirf tajweez nahi kiya uski tarteeb badal di thi bus ...


Dua go

qadeertoopchi
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