accident and death of dreams

hi every one

i would like to share most heartbreaking incident of my life with u all. this isncident has changed many lives in my family apart from me. i m still trying to come over from this as my cousin is  trying too.

in the year 2003 my father expired suddenly though he was a hale and hearty person. when he expired we all were preparing for a marriage in the family after a very long period. but his death shattered us all. and it was felt like the spine of the family was taken away and the family started to fall down gradually ( as we live in joint family) and this incident took place just a month before the marriage. thus all the preprations were stopped. my eldest uncle whose son`s marriage it was, said i cannt wait for long to held the marriage as the girl`s family is forcing for early marriage so only after 3 months the marriage took place which shd have waited atleast for 6 months atleats so no one from us, i.e., my mom bro and me took participation in it. but then by and by the time went on. and the person who stood along wid us since papa expired was my eldest cousin. he was merely 1 yr elder to me and still he was so caring and loving nature that he was always there wid me and bro to help out in even the smallest prob as papa used to do. he always tried to make us forget teh absence of papa. after papa he was the spinal cord of the family. the most lovable jewel of the family. well in 2004 nov his marriage was fixed. i was happiest person among all as i wd have my only` bhabhi`whom i cd love and open my heart to as i m the eldest sister among the cousins so after papa if i had anything to look fwd to was cousin`s marriage. but 3 months before the function could take place , i.e. , in Aug. 2004 the unexpected thing happened. my cousin was out to our farms wid his friends and that day it was raining hard and that was the day of India Pak match also and that was a day and night match. so when they were returning from there his friends had drunk a lot, so he asked to drive Safari but his friend refused saying no i can handle it so u sit and relex, for 1 hour he drove and meanwhile he crashed into  roadside houses three times but they survived. just 20 minutes before they could enter the city he said to my cousin that now he should drive as he was not feeling ok so my cousin took over from him. and just before that my would be `bhabhi` called him on cell and said that she had got a wedding gift for him and asked what did he buy for her and she also told him that she has given order for her wedding dress. so the happiness of the guy could be imagined by the smile on his face when we loast saw him. well when he started to drive the rain started to puir down heavily and in night it was difficult to see clearly. suddenly there was a splash of loght in front and by the time he could mannage it was too late, Safari skid and bangged wid a great sound into a truck which was already punctured and was half sunk into the roadside mud. the noise and the crash was so powerful that the chairs of the near by`dhabas` fell down and the people ran out to see what happened. only two person sitting in the last seat survived widout a scratch and one among them was the one who was driving prior to my cousin and who crashed into houses three times, well out of 8 people only three survived, among the three one is paralised below waist and one his hands too suffer partial paralisis. my cousin and the one to whom safari belonged died on the spot and rest three expired in two days and a month after the accident respectively. well when i saw my cousins body i was so shocked that i fainted and was unconsious for a long time. his head was crushed from three sides as the whole body of safari was crumpled into driver`s corner and his body was so limp as it stuck between the seat and the rest metal body that for half and hour he was not found. his nose was cut his shoulder musclles and skin were torn out like a cotton from cotton pillow. i cannt forget the sight and when i compare it to my father`s last view i shiver as my papa was smiling and was on verge of saying something. these two incidents of two most impacting males in my life broke me to the very deapths of my soul. i was very courageous girl before this but now everything has changed and i see life morte clearly and i think i m turning pessimist and i all my dreams are broken as no oen is there to support me, i feel so insecure in the absence of my father and elder brother. not me alonbe but my cousin`s younger bro has faced the same prob. apart from us the girl to whom he was supposed to marry in 3 months time was shattered badly. she went under deprerssions and with very care and love we were able to lift her spirits up. but in uplifting her me and my younger lost our hopes and i kno under what pressures we are going through and facing the life. but this incident all togather shattered the dreams o many and took the faith and belief in our future and life both. :!:

isha u are ryt the life has to go on but u too must agree on a point that zeal to live shd be present and sometimes a person has only hopes through which he or she fight the battle of their life and when that hope is crushed its really hard to live and some times ppl do die and believe me i have seen two living deads after these incidents and to live and see the most beloved person in such stage daily breaks a human heart isnt it?

well atleast i felt so, well thaks for ur concern and yes i m trying to come over the trauma.

KAMYANI ji i m really feeling bad after reading this.

i dont have words to give my condolences,

dear jo kuch bhi tumhare sath hua hain, is really sad , but i m sure of one thing that it will make u a real human being.

rahi baat life mein zeal ki to dear sumtimes u shud b happy to make others happy

kisi ki muskurahaton pe ho nisar
kisi ka dard mil sake to le udhaar
kisi k vaaste ho tere dil mein pyaar
jeena isi ka naam hai

god bless u

Zindgi ki khasiyat hai yeh kabhi jhukti nahi...
saanse ruk jati hai magar jindgi rhukti nahi..

kuch jayada nahi kahugi cos really tears came in eyes feeling the pain that u felt. par u have to be more courageous then earlier...as you have to give courage to your family...
the loss u incurred that no one can compensate but for sure ur father and brother wont be happy to see tears in ur eyes if they had been watching you from somewhere.

Ana u wrote really good........hope it helps Kamyayni!!!

hmmmm oh kamya i understand wat u mean yaar......thats how i felt when my "Tayaji" died.....but see here i'm and life is going on!!
i'm sure u'll do best to help everyone and uorself too......
good luck dear!!!

dear  kamyayni...we are always with u.. its a part of life but not heart of life.... life goes on and on.

tera koi saath na de to tu khud se preet jod le...
bichhauna dharti ko karke arey akaash odh le...
poora khel abhi jeevan ka tuney kahan hai khela...
chal akela chal akela................................