Jaam-e-Ruqsar

by md.ayad on June 08, 2009, 08:09:53 AM
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md.ayad
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MAIKADO KI MEHFIL ME AB HUMARA BHI NAAM HOGA SHAMIL  Feared.
Apne Ruqsar ka wo jaam pilane lagte hai
  Aetbar kare bhi tho un par kaise zaalim
  Wo hume aksar nashe me ch'hod jaate hai

Unhe dekhna bhi ab Gunah hoga shayad sad11
Wo aksar Naqab pehne guzra karte hai
  Mere AansuO ki Qadr karta nahi hai koi crybaby2 crybaby2
  kyu hum begano ke liye inhe bahaya karte hai

Gar Pyar karna zulm hai tho hamaine kiya hai zulm
Mujhe mere zaalim se juda kyu karte hai
  Mere Afsane me hone shumar dekho
  KAHA KAHA SE PATHAR CHALE AATE HAI Clapping Smiley

wo paband they mere pyar me
aur main bhatakta tha unki yaad me tearyeyed

Shayad a jaadu tha Ishq ka ya thi hasad jawani ki BangHead
Hum Apno me Lazzat dhoonda karte hai
  NAFS ki is Behkave aakar,Ae AYAD
  HUMAPNE HI RAAH PAR KAANTE BICH'HA RAHE HAI................... Crying
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~~~Jaam~~~ by Ravinder in Shayari -e- Husn
Jaam pe jaam pilaye jaa saqi... by daljeet_faqeer in Kaifiyaat-ae-maye
Azeem Azaad
WeCare
Mashhur Shayar
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«Reply #1 on: June 08, 2009, 11:36:00 AM »
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NiceOne Ayad Ji,.
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MHussain
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«Reply #2 on: June 09, 2009, 10:48:43 PM »
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Good effort Mr. Ayad, but try to balance the lines.
Example

Hum pee ke jame rukhsar behek jatey hayn
Kia masti hay jo madhosh se ho jatey hayn
Khoob nasha hay us ki har ada mein samaya
Kia Ramz hay yeh hum samajh na patey hayn

'Ramz'

This is a simple example of Rubai, follow the meter as mentioned.
Any help please let me know.
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md.ayad
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«Reply #3 on: June 10, 2009, 08:02:41 AM »
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Quote from: MHussain on June 09, 2009, 10:48:43 PM
Good effort Mr. Ayad, but try to balance the lines.
Example

Hum pee ke jame rukhsar behek jatey hayn
Kia masti hay jo madhosh se ho jatey hayn
Khoob nasha hay us ki har ada mein samaya
Kia Ramz hay yeh hum samajh na patey hayn

'Ramz'

This is a simple example of Rubai, follow the meter as mentioned.
Any help please let me know.

Assalamu Alaikum
Hum abhi thode nahi bohat zyada kache shayar hain
Is liye galti ho to sudhar dena
                            yours Ayad
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Roja
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«Reply #4 on: June 10, 2009, 08:05:19 AM »
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Nice shayari Ayad ji..Accha laga padkar  Usual Smile
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syednaami
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«Reply #5 on: June 10, 2009, 11:37:35 AM »
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MD.Ayad sahib,
Bahut bahtreen shayiri hai, parh kar achha laga...
Hussain Sahib, aap ne bhi achhi shayiri aur sabaq paish kiya hai...
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salil2002
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«Reply #6 on: June 10, 2009, 11:45:36 AM »
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ayad bhai pahle toh aapka yoindia mein swagat karte hain
........aur aapne yeh jo behtareen peshkash kii hai uske liye daad kabool kijiye
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_Vicky_
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«Reply #7 on: June 11, 2009, 06:25:36 AM »
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Ayad Ji Behad Khubsoorat aur Dil Ko Chhoo jane Wale Alfaaz Likhe Hain aapne.. Lajawab Peshkash hai aapki.. Applause Applause


**~** Mann **~**
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deepika_divya
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«Reply #8 on: June 11, 2009, 04:52:25 PM »
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wah Wah Ayed ji.. bahoot bahoot Khoob!
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md.ayad
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«Reply #9 on: June 13, 2009, 07:56:33 AM »
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Quote from: Mann on June 11, 2009, 06:25:36 AM
Ayad Ji Behad Khubsoorat aur Dil Ko Chhoo jane Wale Alfaaz Likhe Hain aapne.. Lajawab Peshkash hai aapki.. Applause Applause


**~** Mann **~**
Aap sab Dost o ahbab ko is nacheez ki taraf se shukriya
khaas kar MANN sahab aap wo pehle shaqs hai jinho ne meri shayari su kar taliya bajai
syed.nami,saahil,sophi aap sab ka phir ek bar tahe dilse shukriya
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MHussain
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«Reply #10 on: June 15, 2009, 11:03:27 PM »
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Not to disappoint you Mr. Ayad, just a little effort towards poetry. Waiting to see your new work.
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shab
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«Reply #11 on: June 15, 2009, 11:19:28 PM »
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BADHIYA QALAAM HAI AAPKA AYAD SAHAB,HAME BHAA GAYI
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madhuwesh
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«Reply #12 on: June 18, 2009, 03:29:57 AM »
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Beautiful creation mdayad ji. Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley
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pandit
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«Reply #13 on: June 22, 2009, 01:56:49 AM »
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BAHUT ACCHE AYAD JEE..
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md.ayad
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«Reply #14 on: July 06, 2009, 06:56:36 AM »
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Zindagi ke sawalo ka Jawab Dhoondta hu
Dard ko kam kar sake wo sharab Dhoondta hu
WaQt ke Haatho majboor ek shaQs hu
Jo Jeene ka de Bahana WO KITAAB DHOONDTHA HU
                                     NM
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