Be-arayish rakhna chahte hain !:Miscellaneous Shayri

Ricky

Yoindian Shayar

Rau: 8

Offline

Gender: Male

Waqt Bitaya:
4 days, 3 hours and 56 minutes.

Posts: 2455
Member Since: Dec 2003

As I said in previous post.. there are two versions of same poem. Rather I have two poems on same theme. So here is the second one.

The first one can be found at : "Gumshuda ho Jaun"

Khamosh rakhna chahte hain
Inn lavzon ko duniya sae dur rakhna chahte hain,
Naa jane kya ye kehde,isliye inko..
Kaghaz sae durr, be arayish rakhna chahte hain !

Koi pooch naa le aake humse sabab..
Aur hum ab gumshuda hona chahte hain..

Shayad kamyab ho jayen iss justuju..
Wajah yahi ki makaam apna badalna chahte hain…

Dayera bamushkil itna ho,
Jee sake bass aur kuch nahi….
Wo makaan ab aisa chahte hain,

Naa aaye koi khat naa paigham,
Anjane shehar mein anjaana ho thikana…
Bass aisa ab jahaan chahte hain,

Khuda jaane kab kare manzoor ye dua
Jald se jald ho pura vayeda…
Aur fir hum gum jana chahte hain …!!

As I said before.. feel free to comment / criticize.


	Logged

Similar Poetry and Posts (Note: Find replies to above post after the related posts and poetry)
	CHAHTE HAIN.. by Farah Aziz in Shayri for Khumar -e- Ishq
	Khamosh rakhna chahte hai... by Heena khan in Other Languages
	Hum chahte hain jinko by sarfaraz_sagar in Ghazals
	<>Ek Sham chahte hain<> by KasaK....Dil Ki in Shayri for Khumar -e- Ishq
	hum tume chahte hain by saahill in Shayri for Khumar -e- Ishq

syednaami

Guest

Re: Be-arayish rakhna chahte hain !

«Reply #1 on: April 12, 2008, 10:22:26 PM »

Yeh buhat hi achhi shayari ka muzaahira hai.
Aap ka andaaz-e-bayaan achha laga.
Spelling and pronunciations should be

lavzon(Lafzon) sae(se) justuju(Justaju) fir (Phir) thikana (thhikaana)
Talaffuz ka khayal rahe, baaqi zabardast nazm hai.


	Logged

Ricky

Yoindian Shayar

Rau: 8

Offline

Gender: Male

Waqt Bitaya:
4 days, 3 hours and 56 minutes.

Posts: 2455
Member Since: Dec 2003

Re: Be-arayish rakhna chahte hain !

«Reply #2 on: April 13, 2008, 06:58:17 AM »

What you write is what you get do not fit to English scripting. It is incapable of properly making different words. For Hindi / urdu word there is no definitive spellings.

But I am glad that you corrected me for "Lafzon". About "sae", I use it intentionally instead of "se", just like we use "toh", though "to" is better, we use "h" in order to distinguish from english "to" .Shukriya for you concern, but I feel in english scripting for Hindi / Urdu words, there can't be definitive spellings.

But if it is Hindi/urdu there what you write is what you get really matters.

Shukriya for appreciating my Nazm. Your comments are valuable.


	Logged

syednaami

Guest

Re: Be-arayish rakhna chahte hain !

«Reply #3 on: April 13, 2008, 11:10:02 AM »

Aisa nahin hai, urdu / hindi words ka general spelling system aisa hona chahiye ki har koi bina jhijhak padh sake, bhale aap ne jaise kaha "What you write is what you get" saheeh kaha, paratu jab ek aasan Shabd Raashi system maojud hai, jo aam tor par hum likhte hai. Agar aap 'se' ko 'sae' likhenge to zara der se shabd ka pata chalta hai.
Meri bhi yehi koshish hoti hai ki ussi system ko follow karun.
Roman ABC main har zubaan ke liye ek system maojud hai, maslan Malay/Bahasa Indonesia, Swahili ya Vietnamese waghairah.

Wikipedia par ek system hai jo buhat hi paichida hai aur har koi simple keyboard se likh nahin sakta.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roman_Urdu

Shukriya


	Logged

Ricky

Yoindian Shayar

Rau: 8

Offline

Gender: Male

Waqt Bitaya:
4 days, 3 hours and 56 minutes.

Posts: 2455
Member Since: Dec 2003

Re: Be-arayish rakhna chahte hain !

«Reply #4 on: April 13, 2008, 06:28:55 PM »

There you got a nice point but I believe that Urdu / Hindi looks better when they written in their own script. So it is not really a choice to learn ROMAN when we are doing without learning.

I highly doubt that such standardization on Roman Urdu / Hindi are doing to be popular ever.


	Logged

syednaami

Guest

Re: Be-arayish rakhna chahte hain !

«Reply #5 on: April 13, 2008, 09:43:53 PM »

Yes I doubt so, but I am simply talking about internet and mobile. Yoindia is an example and I think I need not to say much.
How many text messages we receive and how many of those messages contain Hindi/Urdu script?
Well you know.
Thanks and Regards


	Logged

amrita

Guest

Re: Be-arayish rakhna chahte hain !

«Reply #6 on: October 08, 2008, 06:51:57 PM »

beautiful..!


	Logged

Pages: [1]

Yoindia ShayariAdab > Shayri ( Poetry ) or Shayari > Miscellaneous Shayri > Topic: Be-arayish rakhna chahte hain !