Ab To Laut Ke Aajao Jan.........Rishi -Panna 2:Share: Poetry of Pain

jems

Guest

«Reply #15 on: January 12, 2010, 10:06:08 AM »

(written bye Rishi)Kitni Bechain Ho Gai Hai Ab Ye Saansein Meri
Tere Bin Bahut Roti Hai Ab Ye Aankhein Meri

(written by somebodyels)kitni bechain hai ye sanse meri
bina tere bohat roti hain ye aankhein meri

aap bilkul sahi hain Rishi sahab ye chori nhi hai aapne to isme do lafz bada diye hain to bhala ye chori kaise huii, nice work,

(written by Rishi)Na Jane Kabse Meri Aankho Ko Neend Aati Hi nahi
Ab Meri Bahein Mangti Hai Mujhse Ratein Teri

(written by somebodyels)kab se meri aankho ko neend aati he nahi
bahain mangti hai mujh se ratain teri, yahan bhi aapne kuch lafz joRd diye to zahir ye chori kahan se huii jo bhi aisa kehta hai bilkul ghalat hai,

(written by Rishi)Ab To Laut Ke Aajao Jan Tere Bin Dil Lagta Nahi
Wapas Tum Ko Bula Rahi Hai Ye Bahein Meri

(written by somebodyels)jaan aajao k ab dil kahi lagta hi nahi
tum ko bola rahi hai ye bahein meri, daikhye kitna juda khyaal hai aapka is sher se kahin milta hi nahi to kon keh sakta hai ki ye chori, no never,

bas ek baat aapne ghalat keh di ki saare shayar chori karte hain isme bina wajah aapne apne aap ghaseet lia karte honge saare shayar chori karte honge magr aap unme se nhi hain to aap aisa mat sochiye ke aap us qism ke shayar hain jo chori karte hain aap ki shayri kahin uper hai, you.n hi likhiye


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Rishi Agarwal

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Re: Ab To Laut Ke Aajao Jan.........Rishi

«Reply #16 on: January 12, 2010, 10:32:00 AM »

Quote from: iAdmin on January 12, 2010, 09:41:27 AM

Topic Locked.
Further discussion on this topic will be only through PMs.

Sir Mein Sophi JI Ko PM Nahi Kar Skta Kyuki Unhone Mujhe Ignore List Mein Dal Rkha Warna mujhe Is Bat Ki Ahmiyat Pta Hai And Aapne Aage Ke Post Nahi PAdhi HOngi Kyuki wo delete kar DI Hai And I Want Ki Ye Mera Likha Hai SO Mujhe Sharing Option Mein Kyu Dalu Apni Post Ko Help Me ?


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Rishi Agarwal

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Re: Ab To Laut Ke Aajao Jan.........Rishi

«Reply #17 on: January 12, 2010, 10:33:43 AM »

Bahut Bahut Shukriya Sir ANd Gusse Mein HUmse Bhul Gai Uske Liye Sory And Aapke Is Tarah Se Hausla Afjai Karne Ka Shukariya


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abdbundeli

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Re: Ab To Laut Ke Aajao Jan.........Rishi

«Reply #18 on: January 12, 2010, 10:53:39 AM »

Quote from: Rishi Agarwal on January 11, 2010, 12:40:27 PM

Kitni Bechain Ho Gayeen Hain Ab Ye Saansein Meri
Tere Bin Bahut Rotin Hain Ab Ye Aankhein Meri

Aake Lag Ja Gale Mere Tere Bin Ab Raha Na Jaye
Dil Bhulane Se Bhi Nahi Bhulta Woh Batien Teri

Na Jane Kabse Meri Aankhon Ko Neend Aati Hi nahin
Ab Meri Bahein Mangtin Hain Mujhse Ratein Teri

Mere Samne se Tu chali jati Hai To Jaan Nikal Jati Hai
Wapas Tere Aane Se Lot Aati Hai Ye Sansen Meri

Ab Kab Talak Ye Lamha Judai Ka Rulayega Mujhko
Dil Laga Beitha Hai Seene Se Bas Ab Yaadein Teri

Meri Rooh Ko Chorkar Tum Ja Payoge Kaha Tak
Wapas Lot Ke Le Aayengin Fir Paas Tumhe Wafayen Meri

Ab To Laut Ke Aajao Jan Tere Bin Dil Lagta Nahin
Wapas Tum Ko Bula Rahin Hain Ye Bahein Meri

Rishi ji! Achchhaa likhaa hai!

(Wiyogee hogaa pahlaa kavi: aah sey upjaa hogaa gaan! = Mahakavi Sumitranandan Pant)

Mein ney kuchh spellings mein 'change' kiyaa hai! Deykhiyegaa sahee hain yaa nahin!
Aapkee shayari mein roz-b-roz nayee chamak aayegee, aisaa meyraa 'anumaan' hai!
Likhtey rahiye! 'Aalochnaaoun' kee chintaa mat keejye! Log tabhee 'react' kartey hain, jab unkey kuchh 'gahree-see' lagney waalee 'kalpanaa' saamney hotee hai! Sophi ji ney 'kuchh' miltaa-jultaa-saa kaheen/kabhee padhhaa hogaa: aisaa hotaa rahtaa hai - meyree kayee 'rachnaaoun' key saath bhi aisaa ho chukaa hai!

- abd bundeli


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deepika_divya

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Re: Ab To Laut Ke Aajao Jan.........Rishi

«Reply #19 on: January 12, 2010, 10:59:08 AM »

Abd ji .. Shayad aapne upar mere comments nahi dekhe... Kuch milta julta nahi.. balki 2 sher bikhul ak jaise hai.. sir ak ya do word ko chod kar... jaisa ki guest ka comment bhi hai...

Aur upar se in janaab ne yea bhi kaha hai ki sab shayar sher churate hai... kya aap sher chura kar likhte hai... Huh?

bataiye... Huh?

yea rishi ne pehli baar nahi kiya hai aisa woh pehle bhi kar chuka hai

Bina saboot ke ya ankho mea patti baand ke maine kuch nahi kaha wahin kaha jo sach hai aur jo sahi hai....

Aap umda shayar hai aur main aapki ijjat karti hun... Agar meri baat buri lagi ho tho maafi chahti hun...


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iAdmin

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Re: Ab To Laut Ke Aajao Jan.........Rishi

«Reply #20 on: January 12, 2010, 11:11:27 AM »

Those who do not comply with Yoindia Rules can't be allowed on Yoindia.

TOPIC LOCKED : USE PMS.


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