भटकती हूँ, नज़र आता नहीं किनारा मुझ को...

by mixie on April 04, 2014, 04:12:53 AM
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mixie
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भटकती हूँ, नज़र आता नहीं किनारा मुझ को
ये किसकी याद आई है दोबारा मुझ को

दश्तो-दर में गूँजती है इक आवाज़
ये किस ने सर-ऐ-आम पुकारा मुझ को

अब जो आये तो समेट ले आ कर
करती हैं ये हवाएँ आवारा मुझ को
 
उसके आने से है बदली हर शकल
ये किसकी नज़र ने है सँवारा मुझ को

खुद को अब पहचानती ही नहीं 'मीना'
ये अपने रंग में किसने है उतारा मुझ को

Bhatakti hun, nazar aata nahin kinaara mujh ko
ye kiski yaad aayee hai dobaara mujh ko

dasht-o-dar mein gunjti hai ik awaaz
ye kis ne sar-e-aam pukaara mujh ko

ab jo aaye to samet le aa kar
karti hain ye hawaein awaara mujh ko

uske aane se hai badli har shakl
ye kiski nazar ne hai sanwaara mujh ko

khud ko ab pehchanti hi nahin 'meena'
ye apne rang mein kisne hai utaara mujh ko
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sksaini4
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«Reply #1 on: April 04, 2014, 08:37:55 AM »
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bahut khoobsoorat kalaam
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jeet jainam
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«Reply #2 on: April 04, 2014, 10:28:01 AM »
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 Applause Applause Applause Applause
bohut khub
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nandbahu
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«Reply #3 on: April 04, 2014, 02:27:33 PM »
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bahut badhiya
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premdeep
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«Reply #4 on: April 04, 2014, 03:22:14 PM »
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खुद को अब पहचानती ही नहीं 'मीना'
ये अपने रंग में किसने है उतारा मुझ को
 icon_flower icon_flower icon_flower icon_flower Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley :clapping:excellent mam
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vb
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«Reply #5 on: April 04, 2014, 08:25:20 PM »
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Mohtarma mixie sahiba! salam masnoon

Acchi ghazal hay, hamari taraf say daad qabool kijay...

is ghazal main kaafi gunjaish hay k isay behter kiya jayay, lekin aap ka kalaam jazbaati hota hay aur is ka khaas aahang hota hay... jazbaati kalaam ko aap khud behter kar sakti hen aur duniya ka koi shakhs isay behter nahi kar sakta. koi aur koshish karay ga tu is ka aahang mutaasir ho ga... aur kalaam ki khoobsoorti jaati rahay ge... hamara khayaal hay k aap ki ghazal ka wazan aap k is misray k mutabiq hona chahiyay...

ye apne rang mein kisne hai utaara mujh ko

ye kis ne aa kay sar-e-aam pukaara mujh ko  <===< (halki si tabdeeli pr maazrat)


mashwara detay huay hamen dar hota hay k hamari baat ko aitraz na koi samajh lay.. ya kisi ko sher kehtay hesitation na feel ho... halaan-kay hamari khaahish sirf ye hay k may be kisi k kuch kaam aa sakay hamaari kaawish. baqol Ghalib

Surma-e-muft nazar hoon, meri qeemat ye hay
kay rahay chashm-e-khareedaar pay ehsaaN mera


dua go
ahqar-vb jee
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Advo.RavinderaRavi
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«Reply #6 on: April 05, 2014, 03:19:36 AM »
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Bahut Khoob.
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mixie
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«Reply #7 on: April 05, 2014, 05:26:16 AM »
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I agree ahqar-vb jee aur aapki bahut shukr-guzaar hun ki aap apna waqt dekar meri ghazals ko aur behtreen karna chahte hain...I truly appreciate this.

Thank you very much.

Baki sab ka bhi tah-e-dil se shukriya meri ghazal ko pasand karne ke liye.

Mixie 'meena'
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aqsh
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«Reply #8 on: April 05, 2014, 01:45:27 PM »
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Waaaaaaaaaaaaaah...Bahut khoooooob mixie ji... dheron daaaaaaaaad...
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kavyanshi
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«Reply #9 on: April 08, 2014, 10:09:21 PM »
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bhut achha h...jazbaati h..
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