sitam kabhi(CSET)

by MANOJ6568 on December 21, 2011, 04:00:12 AM
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MANOJ6568
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Sitam kabhi uspe apna mei dha na saka
lakh chahane pe bhi use gale laga na saka

ki her mumkin kausise hamne to bahut dost
daman mager kabhi use mei apna chura na saka

bhatakta raha idar udhar mei bahut manoj
uljhane mager kabhi apni suljha na saka

hua tha jabse parshaan wo mere karan
nazere kabhi khud se mei mila na saka
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mkv
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«Reply #1 on: December 21, 2011, 06:18:20 AM »
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Bahut khoob likha hai Manoj bhai..
3rd & 4th ash'aar ko interchange kar de to maja aaye.
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MANOJ6568
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«Reply #2 on: December 21, 2011, 06:46:52 AM »
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thanx

aap  kis sher mei kah rahe hai
Quote from: mkv on December 21, 2011, 06:18:20 AM
Bahut khoob likha hai Manoj bhai..
3rd & 4th ash'aar ko interchange kar de to maja aaye.
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mkv
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«Reply #3 on: December 21, 2011, 06:50:12 AM »
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It's just my suggestion. I hope u take it in the right spirit.
teesre sher ko maqte ki jagah pe rakhiye.
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poonamA
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«Reply #4 on: December 21, 2011, 07:00:36 AM »
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hum to majud thay andhero me ujalo ki tarah
tumne chaha he nahi chane walo ki tarah
NM
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sksaini4
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«Reply #5 on: December 21, 2011, 07:03:10 AM »
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 Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause
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MANOJ6568
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«Reply #6 on: December 21, 2011, 04:46:26 PM »
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thanx
Quote from: sksaini4 on December 21, 2011, 07:03:10 AM
Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause
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