Buri aadat ko ...

by tamanna.pt on April 28, 2010, 03:10:30 PM
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tamanna.pt
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                    Buri aadat ko aise badhaya na karo,
                    De zakhm zamana to muskuraya na karo.

                    Maarna patthar to hai dastoor-e-duniya lekin,
                    Aaine-e-dil ko hatheli pe sajaaya na karo.

                    Mat baanton ye haq gairon me is tarah,
                    Lagao dil na jisse,chot bhi usse kabhi khaya na karo.

                    Kisko samjhaoge ye dard apna,k kaun farishta hai yahan,
                    Insaanon se to umeed ye lagaaya na karo.

                    Deni padhe gawaahi jab andhoon k sheher me,
                    Har baat ko nazroon se bataya na karo.

                    Utthe jikr jab bhi mehfil me gunaahgaaro ka,
                    Yun ghabra k nazrein jhukaya na karo.




                               ----Tamanna----
                      
                          
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Mashhur Shayar
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kalam k chalne ko zamaana paagalpan samajhta hai.

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«Reply #1 on: April 28, 2010, 03:33:21 PM »
main shabd dhund raha hoon aapki is kavita k taarif k liye par mujhe aise koi shabd sujh hi nahi rahe hain... bahut bahut khoob likha hai aapne Tamanna ji... aapne apni is kavita me bahut kadwa sach likha hai par sach to sach hi hota hai... sirf sach.. jeewan ki sachchai hai ye... hum jaante huye bhe galtiyaan karte hain.. agar hum khud ko samjha paayein to isse achchi baat kya ho sakti hai... bahut khoob...

Kisko samjhaoge ye dard apna, k kaun farishta hai yahaan.
Insaano se to umeed ye lagaya na karo...

saare sher ek se badhkar ek hain. kisi se kisi ki koi tulna nahi ho sakti. par ye do line mere dil ko chhoo gayi. bahut khoobsurat baat kahi hai aapne. koshish ki hai maine kuch panktiyaan likhne ki. shayad aapko khaas pasand na aaye.

zaalim zamaane k zulm-o-sitam zeher hain,
inhen tum apne hothon se lagaya na karo,

tanhaa safar me tanhaayiaan bahut hain,
par haal-e-dil kisi se bayaan na karo,

jhoote hain log , vaade bhi sab jhoote hain,
kisi sangdil se yahaan dil lagaya na karo...
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tamanna.pt
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«Reply #2 on: April 28, 2010, 03:41:36 PM »
  Shukriya kapil ji, har baar ki tarah itne dil se meri koshish ko padh k pasand kiya hai aapne ,bahut khushi hui. Aur aap to itna achha likhte hai to kaise nahi pasand aayega aapka likha hua. bahut umda likha hai.Bahut shukriya meri koshish ko pasand karne or apni kalam se mera saath dene k liy.
Quote from: klaskar on April 28, 2010, 03:33:21 PM
main shabd dhund raha hoon aapki is kavita k taarif k liye par mujhe aise koi shabd sujh hi nahi rahe hain... bahut bahut khoob likha hai aapne Tamanna ji... aapne apni is kavita me bahut kadwa sach likha hai par sach to sach hi hota hai... sirf sach.. jeewan ki sachchai hai ye... hum jaante huye bhe galtiyaan karte hain.. agar hum khud ko samjha paayein to isse achchi baat kya ho sakti hai... bahut khoob...

Kisko samjhaoge ye dard apna, k kaun farishta hai yahaan.
Insaano se to umeed ye lagaya na karo...

saare sher ek se badhkar ek hain. kisi se kisi ki koi tulna nahi ho sakti. par ye do line mere dil ko chhoo gayi. bahut khoobsurat baat kahi hai aapne. koshish ki hai maine kuch panktiyaan likhne ki. shayad aapko khaas pasand na aaye.

zaalim zamaane k zulm-o-sitam zeher hain,
inhen tum apne hothon se lagaya na karo,

tanhaa safar me tanhaayiaan bahut hain,
par haal-e-dil kisi se bayaan na karo,

jhoote hain log , vaade bhi sab jhoote hain,
kisi sangdil se yahaan dil lagaya na karo...
Logged
~Hriday~
Poetic Patrol
Mashhur Shayar
***

Rau: 115
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Gender: Male
Waqt Bitaya:
101 days, 3 hours and 51 minutes.

kalam k chalne ko zamaana paagalpan samajhta hai.

Posts: 16243
Member Since: Feb 2010


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«Reply #3 on: April 28, 2010, 04:02:57 PM »
Shukriya Tamanna ji. Aapki itni pyaari kavita hamaari nazron se chhipke kaise nikal sakti thi. Aap likhte hi itna khoob hain ki hum taarif kiye bina reh nahi paate. Ek baar fir se keh raha hoon... bahut khoob likha hai aapne.

Quote from: tamanna.pt on April 28, 2010, 03:41:36 PM
 Shukriya kapil ji, har baar ki tarah itne dil se meri koshish ko padh k pasand kiya hai aapne ,bahut khushi hui. Aur aap to itna achha likhte hai to kaise nahi pasand aayega aapka likha hua. bahut umda likha hai.Bahut shukriya meri koshish ko pasand karne or apni kalam se mera saath dene k liy.
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neelgold
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«Reply #4 on: April 28, 2010, 08:46:09 PM »
Bhut hi Kamal " likha hai ..........very very gud!!!!!!!!!

Reallt lyk it vry much .......

Pls keep writing .........

 Applause Applause Applause Applause
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Rajesh Harish
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«Reply #5 on: April 29, 2010, 04:35:27 AM »
Bahut khoob Tamanna Ji
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tamanna.pt
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«Reply #6 on: April 29, 2010, 04:51:29 AM »
  Shukriya neel ji khushi hui mera likha aapko pasand aaya.
Quote from: neelgold on April 28, 2010, 08:46:09 PM
Bhut hi Kamal " likha hai ..........very very gud!!!!!!!!!

Reallt lyk it vry much .......

Pls keep writing .........

 Applause Applause Applause Applause
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tamanna.pt
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«Reply #7 on: April 29, 2010, 04:53:05 AM »
  Shukriya Rajesh ji.  happy3 
Quote from: Rajesh Harish on April 29, 2010, 04:35:27 AM
Bahut khoob Tamanna Ji
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riyaz106
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«Reply #8 on: April 30, 2010, 04:51:38 AM »
Bahot khoob Tamanna ji. Bahot achha likha hai.
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tamanna.pt
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«Reply #9 on: April 30, 2010, 03:44:22 PM »
   Shukriya riyaz ji. Usual Smile
Quote from: riyaz106 on April 30, 2010, 04:51:38 AM
Bahot khoob Tamanna ji. Bahot achha likha hai.
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tamanna.pt
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«Reply #10 on: May 01, 2010, 10:31:36 AM »
 Kalaam ko pasand karne ka bahut shukriya Shihab ji.
Quote from: Shihab on April 30, 2010, 06:38:44 PM
Bahut Khub Tamann Ji

Yeh Line Badi Achchi Lagi Mujhey

Kisko Samjhaoge Ye Dard Apna, K Kaun Farishta Hai Yahan
     Insaanon Se To Umeed Ye Lagaya Na Karo...

Yun Hi Mehfil Ko Roshan Karte Rahiye

Khush Rahiye...

~Shihab~
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brokenbyluv
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«Reply #11 on: May 01, 2010, 10:46:53 AM »
bahut bahut hi khoob tamanna ji... Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley
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SURESH SANGWAN
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«Reply #12 on: May 01, 2010, 10:48:33 AM »
wah tamanna ji kamaal kar diyaa aapne. Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley

hum to nahin aashnaa farishton se.
insaanon ko bataake dard apna kuchh halke ho lete hain.
wo udaade ise mazaak mein unki marzee.
sunate waqt to kuch deir wo humaare ho lete hain.
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tamanna.pt
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«Reply #13 on: May 01, 2010, 10:53:43 AM »
 Shukriya BBl ji. Kaafi waqt baad aapki daad pakar bahut achha laga. Kalaam ko padhne ka bahut shukriya.
Quote from: brokenbyluv on May 01, 2010, 10:46:53 AM
bahut bahut hi khoob tamanna ji... Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley
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tamanna.pt
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«Reply #14 on: May 01, 2010, 10:58:15 AM »
 Bahut achha likha hai Suresh ji aapne. Aur kalaam ko pasand farmaane ka behad shukriya.
Quote from: SURESH SANGWAN on May 01, 2010, 10:48:33 AM
wah tamanna ji kamaal kar diyaa aapne. Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley

hum to nahin aashnaa farishton se.
insaanon ko bataake dard apna kuchh halke ho lete hain.
wo udaa ise mazaak mein unki marzee.
sunate waqt to kuch deir wo humaare ho lete hain.
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