charaag wo bujh gaya dekho !!!:Shayri-E-Dard

sarfira

Guest

charag wo bujh gya dekho jo kal talak tha roshan
kho gaya dekho humari chahto ka shamiyana jo tha roshan

unhe hi kya mai deta dosh behayaee ka
majhi tha mai awara meri kasti thi tufano se hi jo roshan

na socha yun tadpkar hum rah jyenge
udasi kya wo dete hm ko sahnai ka

samhal ke khud ldkhadaye the bujhti saanso se
jazeera tanz krta he nhi mumkin dubara ho jayga wo roshan

mere dil ki bebasi ko dekh woh bhi roya tha
chmak bharpur tha chiragon sa
u tapish me bujh gaya jo kl tak tha yahan roshan!!!!


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Kohinoor

Guest

Re: charaag wo bujh gaya dekho !!!

«Reply #1 on: August 19, 2011, 04:50:49 PM »

Kitabi chehra b hai uska chaand ki trah..
Wo jal rha hai mere sath chiraag ki trah..
Ajeeb baat hai ki dushman b whi mera...
Azeez hai mujhe jo shakhs apni jaan ki trah...


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sarfira

Guest

Re: charaag wo bujh gaya dekho !!!

«Reply #2 on: August 19, 2011, 04:56:59 PM »

Quote from: Kohinoor on August 19, 2011, 04:50:49 PM

Kitabi chehra b hai uska chaand ki trah..
Wo jal rha hai mere sath chiraag ki trah..
Ajeeb baat hai ki dushman b whi mera...
Azeez hai mujhe jo shakhs apni jaan ki trah...

bht badhiya noor--


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ParwaaZ

Guest

Re: charaag wo bujh gaya dekho !!!

«Reply #3 on: August 19, 2011, 07:32:21 PM »

S fira jee Aadaab!

janab ahsaas O khayaal to khoob rahe .. aur
lafz bhi khoob istemaal kiye haiN aapne ..

Humari daad kabul kijiye.. Par janab aik baat
kaheNge... jab aap do line ka sher kah raheN hai
to dono line's meiN aik gehra connection behad
zaruri hai... other wise aap char line meiN bhi
ashaar kah sakte haiN..

Humne yeH isliye kaha ke aap khud hi apne do do
lines par gaur kar lijiye... aap ki last kalaam
kafi achchi aur behad pur asar koshish thi.. but
aap progress ke bajay regress kar gaye is kalaam
meiN...

Koshish dil se jaari rakhiye... aapke paas bharpur
lafz hai... aur behad achche khayaal so.. keep
try... and do best ...

Keep writting... keep posting..

And Kohinoor jee nice sharing

Khuda Hafez


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M.ASGHAR MIRPURI

Guest

Re: charaag wo bujh gaya dekho !!!

«Reply #4 on: August 19, 2011, 08:15:11 PM »

NICE POETRY SARFIRA JI.ASGHAR


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khujli

Guest

Re: charaag wo bujh gaya dekho !!!

«Reply #5 on: August 20, 2011, 08:32:24 AM »


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sarfira

Guest

Re: charaag wo bujh gaya dekho !!!

«Reply #6 on: September 01, 2011, 11:15:27 AM »

Parwaaz sahab--
aapki salaah bar bar milti rahe isslie hum aisi beja kosisen karte rahenge tongue3

mera na sahi kisi ka to bhala ho hi jayega na aapki baatoN se Usual Smile

yahi to humara maqsad hai sir ji Winking

bahut bahut sukriya ki aap meri naakaam si lekhni ko padh kar salaah dete hain--

aisa hi karte rahiyega aap otherwise mai to likhna hi band kar dunga bas tongue3

khus rahiye aur aate rahiye


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sarfira

Guest

Re: charaag wo bujh gaya dekho !!!

«Reply #7 on: September 01, 2011, 11:19:00 AM »

Quote from: M.ASGHAR MIRPURI on August 19, 2011, 08:15:11 PM

NICE POETRY SARFIRA JI.ASGHAR

sukriya


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sarfira

Guest

Re: charaag wo bujh gaya dekho !!!

«Reply #8 on: September 01, 2011, 11:21:05 AM »

Quote from: qalb on August 20, 2011, 08:32:24 AM


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