~.. Mukaalmaati ghazal ...

by janumanu on September 10, 2012, 09:06:26 AM
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janumanu
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kaha maine ye rat aur din ke jhagde aur kab tak haiN
kaha usne muhabbat ke jahaN maiN dour jab tak haiN

kaha maine tumhare samne kyun aaNkh bhar jaye
kaha usne bahut mumkin hai aise pyar mar jaye

kaha maine tumheN maiN chahiye ya pyaar ye mera
kaha usne muhabbat ke ilaawa tujhme sab tera

kaha maine mukammal teri hun maiN, aadhi nahi lekin
kaha usne muhabbat ka silaa shadi nahi lekin

kaha maine kahaN tak aur mere saath rahna hai
kaha usne badal lungaa abhi to chola pahna hai

kaha maine samandar ka koe sahil nahi ho fir
kaha usne tere jaisi koe pagal nahi ho fir

kaha maine jahaN maiN kyuN muhabbat har jaati hai
kaha usne ye kashti doob kar hi paar jaati hai
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«Reply #1 on: September 10, 2012, 09:25:40 AM »
bahut achhe.. Usual Smile

for last lines.. Applause
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laaiba
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«Reply #2 on: September 10, 2012, 10:10:07 AM »
gd effort lekin mere naqis ilm k lehaz se yeh sinfe sukhan
mukalmati ghazal main khyalat ka tasalsal lazim hai.....
famous shayer farhat abas shah ne iss sinf mein bohat leekha hai
over all gd ........Usual Smile
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janumanu
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«Reply #3 on: September 10, 2012, 10:55:41 AM »
Quote from: laaiba on September 10, 2012, 10:10:07 AM
gd effort lekin mere naqis ilm k lehaz se yeh sinfe sukhan
mukalmati ghazal main khyalat ka tasalsal lazim hai.....
famous shayer farhat abas shah ne iss sinf mein bohat leekha hai
over all gd ........Usual Smile

thnaks ... tasalsal  ............. what does it mean ? Usual Smile

dekhiye mukaalmaati gahzal ... is matlab amne same ki baat cheet se hai... aur jab ye gahzal mai ho to.... ise gahzal ka touch bhi diyaa jana chahiye.... farhat sahab ne likhaa hi hoga... wo nazm bhi ho sakti hai ghazal bhi ..

khyalat ka tasalsal se aapkaa matlab ek hi theme pe hone ka hai ... to... mere hisab se wo gahzal hai ya nazm ye bhi dekh jayega ... lekein fir bhi .......... mujhe nahi lagta ki aap jo kah rahi hai..  wo isme nahi hai... agar mai aapka kaha theek se samjha huN to Usual Smile
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khamosh_aawaaz
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«Reply #4 on: September 10, 2012, 11:00:08 AM »
Quote from: janumanu on September 10, 2012, 09:06:26 AM
kaha maine ye rat aur din ke jhagde aur kab tak haiN
kaha usne muhabbat ke jahaN maiN dour jab tak haiN

kaha maine tumhare samne kyun aaNkh bhar jaye
kaha usne bahut mumkin hai aise pyar mar jaye

kaha maine tumheN maiN chahiye ya pyaar ye mera
kaha usne muhabbat ke ilaawa tujhme sab tera

kaha maine mukammal teri hun maiN, aadhi nahi lekin
kaha usne muhabbat ka silaa shadi nahi lekin

kaha maine kahaN tak aur mere saath rahna hai
kaha usne badal lungaa abhi to chola pahna hai

kaha maine samandar ka koe sahil nahi ho fir
kaha usne tere jaisi koe pagal nahi ho fir

kaha maine jahaN maiN kyuN muhabbat har jaati hai
kaha usne ye kashti doob kar hi paar jaati hai


VERIIIIIIII NAAAAAAAAAAICE
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ParwaaZ
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«Reply #5 on: September 10, 2012, 11:23:13 AM »
Vikas bhai Aadaab!


Bahut khoob bhai achchi kalaam kahi hai...
Sabhi khayaal khoob rahe ...

Meri dheroN dili daad O mubbarakbad kabul
kijiye ... likhate rahiye..
Aate rahiye...

Shaad O aabaad rahiye...
Khuda Hafez... Usual Smile  


Quote from: janumanu on September 10, 2012, 09:06:26 AM



kaha maine kahaN tak aur mere saath rahna hai
kaha usne badal lungaa abhi to chola pahna hai

 icon_salut

kaha maine jahaN maiN kyuN muhabbat har jaati hai
kaha usne ye kashti doob kar hi paar jaati hai

 icon_salut
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mkv
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«Reply #6 on: September 10, 2012, 03:54:32 PM »
very nice janumanu jee

aapka ye andaaz khoob raha. Applause
bahut badhiya
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saahill
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«Reply #7 on: September 10, 2012, 04:02:27 PM »
khub kaha janumanu ji
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laaiba
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«Reply #8 on: September 11, 2012, 06:30:18 AM »
Quote from: janumanu on September 10, 2012, 10:55:41 AM
thnaks ... tasalsal  ............. what does it mean ? Usual Smile

dekhiye mukaalmaati gahzal ... is matlab amne same ki baat cheet se hai... aur jab ye gahzal mai ho to.... ise gahzal ka touch bhi diyaa jana chahiye.... farhat sahab ne likhaa hi hoga... wo nazm bhi ho sakti hai ghazal bhi ..

khyalat ka tasalsal se aapkaa matlab ek hi theme pe hone ka hai ... to... mere hisab se wo gahzal hai ya nazm ye bhi dekh jayega ... lekein fir bhi .......... mujhe nahi lagta ki aap jo kah rahi hai..  wo isme nahi hai... agar mai aapka kaha theek se samjha huN to Usual Smile
ji ji aap bilkul theek samjhe hain ...aisee ghazlen bohat se shayron ne likhen hain ...iss se pehle main ne aik 2 baar padhi hain ye ghazle ....Usual Smile
farhat abas shah bohat top ke shayer hain or yeh sinf par likhna unka ouj e kamal hai,,,
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janumanu
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«Reply #9 on: September 11, 2012, 01:25:50 PM »
Quote from: laaiba on September 11, 2012, 06:30:18 AM
ji ji aap bilkul theek samjhe hain ...aisee ghazlen bohat se shayron ne likhen hain ...iss se pehle main ne aik 2 baar padhi hain ye ghazle ....Usual Smile
farhat abas shah bohat top ke shayer hain or yeh sinf par likhna unka ouj e kamal hai,,,

ji .......... waise maine aisa to kahiN nahi kaah tha aisi gahzal maine hi likhi hai Usual Smile
aur farhat sahab ko kaun nahi jaanta Usual Smile
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F.H.SIDDIQUI
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«Reply #10 on: September 11, 2012, 01:48:49 PM »
 Applause
  nice !!
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