6 week , 6 month , 6 years, of marriage.... my collections..

by punam on August 15, 2007, 04:05:56 AM
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punam
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«Reply #15 on: August 18, 2007, 08:56:23 AM »
Grandma in Court

Lawyers should never ask grandmas a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

---------

In a trial, a small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, an elderly grandmother to the stand.


He approached her and asked; "Mrs.. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you're a big disappointment to me.

You lie, cheat on your wife, manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher.

Yes, I know you."


The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs.. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"

She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster. He's lazy, bigoted, and has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women.

One of them was your wife. Yes I know him."


The defense attorney almost died.

The judge asked both lawyers to approach the bench and in a quiet voice said: "If either of you rascals asks her if she knows me, I'll send you to the electric chair."
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asad_abbas
Guest
«Reply #16 on: August 18, 2007, 09:11:24 AM »
WORDS WOMEN USE
                              FINE
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.


                         FIVE MINUTES
He is getting dressed, this is half an hour

Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been getting 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house
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asad_abbas
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«Reply #17 on: August 18, 2007, 12:41:01 PM »
THIS IS WHAT GIRLS SAY TO BOY
January main sirsiri mulakaat hum ne ki
Febuary main is se kuch baat hum nai ki
March main isharay sai paigaam diay
April main aankhon sai us ne salaam kiay
April main aakar wo ankhon main bas gayaa
June main akar wo dil main utar gaya
July main khaaye hum nai Jenay marnay ki kasmein
August main hum nai kaha toore diengay zamanay ki rasmein
September main achaanak us ne mulaakatein kam kardein
October main us ki yaad ne ankhein num kardein
November main jub us ki shaadi ka card aya
December main usay bhai keh kar dil ko behlaayaa
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asad_abbas
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«Reply #18 on: August 18, 2007, 12:47:21 PM »
Log kehtay hain kayamat kay din marr jaeen gay
Hum bhi bohot chalak hai, mangi thallay war jaeen gay

Wo ankh bari pyaari thi jo hum nay usay mari thi
wo sandle bari bhari thi jo us nai hamay maari thi

Mera dil para hai loose is ko matt karo tum use
Warna parain gay tum ko shoes
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punam
Guest
«Reply #19 on: August 20, 2007, 02:36:44 PM »
Award winner Ad......

Moral of ad: DO WEAR SHIRTS WITH FEVICOL LOGO....



 
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punam
Guest
«Reply #20 on: September 09, 2007, 11:24:42 AM »
Blood Business...........

A Lalloobhai Bihari needed a heart transplant.

A lots of blood was required in case of emergency need of his rare type of blood. This blood was nowhere to be found.

Finally, a Makhichus Marwari with matching blood came forward from Marwar, for this price-less gift to others and next life punya merit it brought for free, to Patna for this free trip at Bihari's expense.


Surgery was accomplished with success. Bihari sent a thank you note, a beautiful car, a diamond ring, and tons of political money to the Marwari for his sense of philanthropy.

Soon in a few months need to attend to Bihari's heart again became necessary.

Marwari was called upon from Rajasthan to Jharkhand at his own expense.

He came flying, stayed like king, gave the blood again and left.

Bihari was cured, sent a simple "Thank you and may God bless you " note.

Marwari was furious

Came running on his feet from one end of the country to the other, loosing half his weight, for his just reward in this life, demanded an explanation why it was such a miserly sense of gratitude from this world famous filthy rich political Bihari now.

Bihari calmly explained, "Ha Bhaia, what I do? I now have Marwari blood in me, remember, you are the one who gave it to me ?"
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sanya310
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«Reply #21 on: September 09, 2007, 12:35:21 PM »
nice ones punam!
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Pooja
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«Reply #22 on: September 09, 2007, 03:06:01 PM »
ha ha ha too good Punam.. Good collection
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punam
Guest
«Reply #23 on: October 04, 2007, 04:47:56 AM »
Thanx sanya and pooja di....
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punam
Guest
«Reply #24 on: October 04, 2007, 04:48:59 AM »
Sardar : What is the name of your car ?

Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with “T”.

Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi petrol se start hoti hai....
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punam
Guest
«Reply #25 on: October 04, 2007, 04:55:35 AM »
A Poor Family Essay.....

A teacher once asks all students to write an essay on the topic “A Poor Family”. One student gets the lowest marks for writing that essay . The student happens to be the richest girl in the entire class and her essay goes on as…

Teacher and student

She writes :

Ek baar ek bahut hee gareeb family thi, husband aur wife dono gareeb they, doo bachey they, woh bhi bahut gareeb they!!!

Ghar ke saare naukar bhi gareeb they, ghar ka maali, driver aur guard bhi bahut gareeb they, ghar ke 4 kuttey bhi gareeb they, 2 din sey chicken nahi khaaya tha, 3 mercedeez car thi,
unki bahut time se servicing nahi hui thi, ghar ka A.C bhi theek nahi chalta tha, ghar mein 1 saal sey paint nahi hua tha family ko holiday ke liye foreign country gaye bhi 6 mahiney ho gaye they, ghar ke 5 mein sey 2 TV to chaltey hee nahi they, all in all, bahut he gareeb family thi!!!!!
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Pooja
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«Reply #26 on: October 05, 2007, 07:05:19 PM »
:lol:  :lol:  :lol: too Good!!
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punam
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«Reply #27 on: October 18, 2007, 04:03:12 AM »
Thanx pooja di...
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punam
Guest
«Reply #28 on: October 18, 2007, 04:03:51 AM »
One day Raja and Rani decided to send messages to each
other by using Pigeon instead of mobile.

The very next day pigeon reached raja without any message.

He was angrier and called to Rani.

She told stupid, "That was a missed call"....
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Azeem Azaad
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«Reply #29 on: October 29, 2007, 02:36:29 PM »
Great Job Poonam,.
Malik Tera Bhala Kare.
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