Hilarious Ones

One professor asked a plumber to come to his
collage WHY ?

Because he wants to check where the question paper is leaking..



A man looking at sky and asks another man. that's a sun or moon ?
He replies : oye, no idea, i am not from this city..



Guy : why are all these people running?
Man : this is a race, the winner will get the cup..
Guy : if only the winner will get the cup, why others are running???



Man brought new umbrella and made hole in it..
Storekeeper asked : why did u made hole in new umbrella ?
Man : from hole i can see whether it is raining or not..




A Man daily climps up a tree and sits over there, u know why ?
He thinks himself as a BRANCH MANAGER....


A fat man visits dietitian.
Doctor said : run 8 kms for 300 days.
After 300 days man phoned : i am slimmer but i am 2400 kms away from home..



A guy suddenly jumps on the railway tracks.

A man shouts : marna hai kya
?

guy says : abey suna nahi
gujrat express platform pe aa rahi hai.









lion : me tera khoon piunga.

musafir : mera khoon thanda
pad gaya he kisi nojvan ka garam khoon pio.

lion : chup raho aaj mera
COLD DRINK pineka mood he...







A man apni wife ke sath coffee shop gaya. hot coffee order ki.
Man : jaldi pile.
wife : why?
Man : because hot is Rs.5 & cold is Rs.10









Ek sher ki shadi me chuha nachne laga,
Sher ne puchha : meri shadi me tera kya kam hai.
Chuha bola : shadi se pehle me bhi ser tha...











Two man ped pe bethkar ga rahe the.. achanak ek man ulta latak ke gane laga..
Dusare ne pucha : ulta kyo latka ?
Wo bola : Oy side B gaa raha hoon.....









CAT : Are DOG bhai SHOLAY
film aadhe chhod kar kyu ja rahe ho ?

DOG : dar lag raha hai,
VEERU bar bar kehta hai, Kutte main tera khoon pi jaunga..









Ek din ek daku sardar ke ghar me gus kar bola SONA kaha he ?
Sardar ne kaha : itna bada ghar he kahi bhi so jao...









A sardar to dudhwala..

sardar : Ek litre gai ka dudh do..
dudhwala : tapeli to dekho kitni chhoti hai.
sardar : thik hai yar, bakri ka dudh do....











Ek sardar har sunday holi
khelta tha. Ek admi ne puchha " sardarji aap kyu har sunday holi
khelte
ho?"

Sardar bola : maine padha
hai " sunday is a holiday"...









Lady to inspector : mere pati 5 din pehle gobi lene gaya tha abhitak vapis nahi aye ?
Inspector replied : to fir aur koi sabji bana lo na......











Ek sardar ne apne naukar se kaha : garden me pani dal ke aa..
Naukar ne kaha : bahar barish ho rahi he..
Sardar : to raincoat pahanake ja..







Ek admi ke sir pe popat betha aur admi mar gaya bolo kyo ?
kyunki popat hathi ka naam tha.. ha .. ha ..ha







1 sardar : yaar ye murghi ke
bache egg tod kar bahar kese aa jate hai ?

2 sardar : pehele ye to bata
ke ye bandh egg me gus kese jate hai ?







Do sardar ne mobile se bor hoke kabutar pal liya..
Ek bar 1 sardar ne 2 sardar ke paas bina msg kabutar bheja..

2 sardar ne phone karke pucha " AISA KYU ?"

1 sardar ne kaha " MISSED CALL THA "..