north indian/south indian/bengali girl 4 u:SMS , mobile & JOKES

you have to think twice before marring to a NorthIndian Girl**********

1. At the time of marriage, a north Indian girl has more boyfriends than her age.

2. Before marriage, she looks almost like a bollywood heroine and after marriage you have to go around her twice to completely hug her.

3. By the time she professes her undevoted love to you, you are
bankrupt because of the number of times you had to take her out to movie
theatres and restaurants. And you wait longingly for her dowry.

4. The only dishes she can think of to cook is paneer butter masala, aloo abji, aloo gobi sabji, aloo matar, aloo paneer, that after eating all those paneer and aloos you are either in the bed with chronic cholestrol or chronic gas disorder.

5. The only growth that you see later in your career is the rise in your monthly phone bill.

6. You are blinded by her love that you think that she is a
blonde. Only later do you come to know that it is because of the mehandhi that she applies to cover her gray hair.

7. When you come home from office she is very busy watching
"Kyonki saas bi kabi bahu thi" that you either end up eating outside or cooking yourself.

8. You are a very "ESpecial" person to her.

9. She always thought that Madras is a state and covers the whole
of south india .

10. When she says she is going to "work out" she means she is
going to "walk out"

11. She has greater number of relatives than the number of people you have in your home town.

12. The only two sentences in English that she knows are "Thank
you" and "How are you"

13. She thinks Govinda can dance better than Michael
Jackson.

******WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A South indian wife

Her mother looks down at you because you didn't study
in IIT or Madras /Anna University.

Her father starts or ends every conversation with " ... I say..."

She has long hair, neatly oiled and braided (The Dubai based
Oil Well Company will negotiate with her on a 25 year contract to extract
coconutoil from her hair.)

She uses the word 'Super' as her only superlative.

Her name is another name for a Goddess or a flower.

Her first name is longer than your first name, middle name and
surname combined (unless you are from Andhra)

When she mixes milk and rice you are never sure whether it is for
the Dog or for herself.

For weddings, she sports a mini jasmine garden on her head and
wears silk saris in the Madras heat without looking too uncomfortablewhile
you are melting in your singlet.

She thinks Mohan Lal is the sexiest man alive.

Her favourite cricketer is Krishnamachari Srikkanth.

Her favourite food is dosa though she has tried North Indian
snacks like Chats (pronounced like the slang for 'conversation')

She bursts into songs with her cousins in every movie.

She bores you by telling you which raaga each song you hear is based on.

You have to give her jewellery, though she has already got plenty of it ..

Her thali (Mangal Sutra) weighs more than the championship belts
worn by WWF wrestlers.

She is more educated than you.

Her father thinks she is much smarter than you...

************* What It means to marry a Bengali girl... .***********************

1. She insists that you are stupid if your computer is more important to you
than maachh bhaja.

2. She will insist on wearing plain cottons for your south Indian cousins marriage.

3. She will wear a bindi bigger than her brain behind it

4.Her hair will be the centre of her universe

5. When she is not oiling and bunning her hair, she is singing robindro
shongeet in a high falsetto voice.

6. when she calls your room `Ghor' you know she's from kolkata..only there
can homes consist of a single room.

7. A meal for her consists of meats of every animal, bird and fish..and in
her father's house, vegetables are a strict no-no

8. For her father, everyone who is not a bengali maybe an eskimo or a
Hottentot..it doesn't matter..as long as she or he isn't a bengali.

9. The family's national hero is the captain of the Mohan Bagan team.

10. During your marriage, you were the only one smiling and grinning..the
rest were too busy making the occasion a cultural event.

11. For her Durga puja is what breathing is to you

12. She has 101 Benaroshees but you have to buy her 4 more this
year...shoshthi, soptomi, Ashtami and Nobomi..then a
new taant for shindoor