Read it fully and enjoy........

Hi

        Read it fully and enjoy..........

Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.
 
Candidate: I am Rameshwar Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology.
 
Interviewer : BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never heard of this college before!
 
Candidate : Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission into it . What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly in 12th.I was getting a paid seat in a good college. But my father said (I prefer to call him 'baap') - "I can not invest so much of money".(The baap actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly
speaking this name - BabanRao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya.
 
Interviewer : ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering.
 
Candidate : Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know , these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments..It is difficult to concentrate. So I flunked  in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I  took 4 + 2 = 7 years.
 
Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6.
 
Candidate : Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try to keep this in mind. 4+2 is  6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really affect exams a lot. I think they ! should ban it.
 
Interviewer : Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.
 
Candidate : No, no.. I am talking about Exams!!
 
Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?
 
Candidate : Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I would complete it. In fact,  when i flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in BEST(Bus corporation in Maharashtra) through some relative ..
 
Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study?
 
Candidate : he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education itself was so much of pain!!
 
Interviewer : Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you worked?
 
Candidate: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current platform . Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As you can see I have experience of different platforms ! (Vashi and Andheri are the places in Mumbai)
 
Interviewer: And which languages have you used?
 
Candidate : Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German, French, Russian and many other languages.
 
Interviewer : Why VC is better than VB?
 
Candidate : It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new language VD!
 
Interviewer : Do you know anything about Assembly Language?
 
Candidate : Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the language our ministers and MPs use in assembly .
 
Interviewer: What is your general project experience?
 
Candidate : My general experience about projects is - most of th! e times they are in pipeline!
 
Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job?
 
Candidate : Sure, Currently I am working for Bata InfoTech ltd. Since joining BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that Bench was another software like Windows.
 
Interviewer : Do you have any project management experience?
 
Candidate : No, but I guess it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and Excel. I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone call and use speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like - 'Showstoppers ' , 'hotfixes', 'SEI-CMM','quality','versioncontrol','deadlines' , 'Customer Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my
mistakes!
 
Interviewer : What are your expectations from our company?
 
Candidate: Not much.
1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.
2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent.
3. I believe in flexi-timings.
4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt and jeans.
5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest wednesday off also, so as to avoid breakdown due to overwork.
6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably 1-2 months) assignments. Personally I prefer US,Australia and Europe. But considering the fact that there is a world cup in West Indies in 2007,I don't mind going there in that period . As you can see I am modest and don't have many expectations. So can I assume my selection?
 
Interviewer: he he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our organization.  In fact I was never entertained so much before.

Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!

thanx Rishi....