~~~~()** YOU CAN LAUGH**()~~~~ ;)

by shaiz on September 15, 2005, 12:10:40 PM
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shaiz
Guest
«Reply #45 on: October 22, 2005, 09:10:43 PM »
Lady : Is this my train?
Station Master : No, it belongs to the Railway Company.
Lady : Don't try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take
this train to New Delhi.
Station Master : No Madam, I'm afraid it's too heavy.


Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choices?
Wife : Yes and no.


A drunkard was brought to court. Just before the trial there was a
commotion in the gallery.
The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted, "Order,
order."
The drunkard immediately responded, "Thank you, your honor, I'll
have a
scotch and soda."


Customer : If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Delhi in
two days time?
Post Master : Yes sir, it definitely will.
Customer : I bet you, it won't.
Post Master : Why not?
Customer : It's addressed to Mumbai.


An absent-minded man went to see a psychiatrist.
'My trouble is,' he said, 'that I keep forgetting things.'
'How long has this been going on?' asked the psychiatrist.
'How long has what been going on?' said the man.


Girl : Do you love me?
Boy : Yes Dear.
Girl : Would you die for me?
Boy : No, mine is undying love.



1st thief : Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!
2nd thief : But this is the 13th floor.
1st thief : Hurry! this is no time for superstitions.


Man : How old is your father?
Boy : As old as me.
Man : How can that be?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born.


Teacher : Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in the
field"
Student : A cow and a bull is grazing in the field
Teacher : How?
Student : Ladies first.


Waiter : I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.
Customer : Don't tell me your problems. Give the menu card.


Customer : Waiter, is this a lamb chop or pork chop?
Waiter : Can't you tell the difference by taste?
Customer : No, I can't.
Waiter : Then does it really matter?


Customer : Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup.
Waiter : Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers.


Customer : Waiter, there's a fly in my soup.
Waiter : That's all right sir, he won't drink much.


Customer : Waiter, there's a fly swimming in my soup.
Waiter : So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?


Customer : Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea cup?
Waiter : I wouldn't know sir, I'm a waiter, not a fortune teller.


Customer : Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
Waiter : Funny? But then why aren't you laughing?


Teacher : Peter, why are you late for school again?
Peter : Well, Miss, I dreamed that I was playing football and
the game went into extra time. Winking
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Similar Poetry and Posts (Note: Find replies to above post after the related posts and poetry)
JUST 4 LAUGH by vasista in Mazahiya Shayri(Funny Shayari)
laugh a loud by shreya in SMS , mobile & JOKES
~~~ HAve a Cup OF Laugh ~~~ by ~Garfield~ in Chit - Chat & General Discussion
have a laugh... by arsenmen in SMS , mobile & JOKES
Do not laugh-only smiles by JHEEL in Miscellaneous Shayri
shaiz
Guest
«Reply #46 on: October 22, 2005, 09:16:29 PM »
7 reasons not to mess with children.

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to
swallow a human because even though it was a very large
mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow
a human;it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him ".


A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children
while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to
see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she
asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing,
the girl replied, "They will in a minute."


A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with
her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy
Mother,she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how
to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one
little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."


One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the
dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother
had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on
her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some
of your hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong
and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and
then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"


The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was
trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all
grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or
'That's Michael,He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out,
"And there's the teacher,she's dead."


A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood.
Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if
I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it,
and I would turn red in the face."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary
position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted,"Cause your feet ain't empty."


The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic
elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a
large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the
apple tray:
"Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the
table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note,
"Take all you want. God is watching the apples.  Winking
Logged
shaiz
Guest
«Reply #47 on: October 22, 2005, 09:23:43 PM »
Sholay Remix...........




Gabbar sends Kaalia and two others to Ramgad to collect the loot-maar software he had ordered.

 

They reach Ramgad and start shouting: "Abe O thakur! Kahan hai woh loot-maar software?

Last date to kab ka nikal gaya".

Thakur [with anger]: "Chillao mat!

jaakar Gabbar se kah do ki

Thakur Software walon ne paagal kutton ke liye software banana bund kar diya hai."

Kaalia: "Bahoot garmi dikha rahe ho thakur? Koi naye programmers hire kiye hain kya?"

Thakur: "Nazar uttha ke dekh, Kaalia, tere sar par powerbuilder chal raha hai."

Kaalia looks up and sees Viru (Dharmendra) working on a PC on one Water tank and

Jay (Amitabh) on another, using a laptop.

Kaalia Starts Laughing and says: "Ha ha... thakur ne freshers ko liya hai ye log Programming karenge? In ko to DOS commands bhi nahin aate."

Veeru shouts: "Chup-chaap chala ja kutte. Hum log consultants hain, Kuch bhi kar sakte hain."

Jay hits his keyboard,then says:"jaao kaalia, Gabbar se kahna ki uska server down ho gaya."

AT GABBAR'S DEN...

Gabbar: "Kitne bugs the?"
Kaalia: "Do sarkaar."

Gabbar: "Wo do! Aur tum teen. Phir bhi fix nahi kar sake?

Kya soch key aaye ho? Gabbar bahoot khush hoga?

Naya assignment dega ...aur increment bhi? Iski saza milegi.

.

barobar milegi."

[Snatches an X terminal from Sambaa]. "Kitne sessions hain is machine mein?"

Sambaa: "Chhey sarkaar."

Gabbar: "Session chhey aur programmer teen. Bahoot naainsaafi hai." [logout - logout - logout].

"Haan ab theek hai... ab tera kya hoga" Kaalia?"

Kaalia: "Sarkaar, maine aapka code likha tha."
Gabbar: "To ab documentation kar!

The End.........  Winking
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nirbhay
Guest
«Reply #48 on: October 23, 2005, 05:16:59 AM »
Fantastic and Fabulous all r g8, keep it up shaiz!!

JAi Shri KriShna!!
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shaiz
Guest
«Reply #49 on: October 23, 2005, 08:44:44 PM »
thnx alot nirbhay,,,!!
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shaiz
Guest
«Reply #50 on: October 23, 2005, 09:26:02 PM »
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."

 

   

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"

 

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"

 

The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!"
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shaiz
Guest
«Reply #51 on: October 23, 2005, 09:53:41 PM »
Ø        > WONDER IF THIS IS TRUE?

Ø      
> >
> > Pass it on to other staff too who consume lot of panadol
> >
> > My husband  was working in a hospital as an IT
> > engineer, as the hospital is planning to  set up a
> > database of its patient. And he knows some of the
> > doctor quite  well. The doctors used to tell him that
> > whenever they have a headache, they  are not willing to
> > take PANADOL PARACETMOL.
> >
> > In fact, they will turn  to Chinese Herbal Medicine or
> > find other alternatives.
> >
> > This is  because Panadol is toxic to the body, and it
> > harms the liver. According to  the doctor, Panadol will
> > reside in the body for at least 5 years. And  according
> > to the doctor, there used to be an incident where an
> > air  stewardess consumes a lot of Panadol during her
> > menstrual as she needs to  stand all the time. She's
> > now in her early 30's, and she needs to wash  her
> > kidney (DIALYSIS) every month.
> >
> > As said by the doctor that  whenever we have a
> > headache, that's because it is due to the electron
> > Ion imbalance in the brain. As an alternative solution
> > to cope with this  matter, they suggested that we buy 1
> > or 2 cans of isotonic drink  (eg.100PLUS), and mix it
> > with drinking water according to a ratio of 1:1 or  1:2
> > (simply, it means one cup 100plus, one cup water. or 2
> > cups water).
> >
> > My husband and I have tried this on several occasions,
> > and it seems  to work well. Another method will be to
> > submerge your feet in a basin of warm  water so that it
> > brings the blood pressure down from your throbbing
> > head.  As Panadol is a pain killer, the more Panadol
> > you take, the lesser would be  your threshold for pain
> > (your endurance level for pain). We all will fall  ill
> > as we aged, for woman, we would need to go through
> > childbirth. Imagine  that we had spent our entire life
> > popping quite a substantial amount of  Panadol (Pain
> > Killer) when you need to have a surgery or operation,
> > you  will need a much more amount of general
> >
> > If you have a very high intake  of Panadol throughout
> > your life (Migraine, Menstrual cramps ) it is  very
> > likely that normal general anesthetic will Have no
> > effects on you as  your body is Pumped full with
> > Panadol and your body is so used to pain killer  that
> > you would need a much stronger pain killer,
> > Morphine?Huh?
> >
> > The  thought is scary enough to turn me to Chinese
> > Herbal Medicine or other  healthier alternative. Value
> > your health, value your life, THINK TWICE b4  you
> > easily pop that familiar pill into your mouth again.
> >
> > Please don't  always PANADOL and try send this to
> > people you care  about.
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >E!
Logged
shaiz
Guest
«Reply #52 on: October 23, 2005, 10:00:40 PM »
Once a sardar was looking at a WANTED poster & was wondering -

Saala wanted tha to photo kheenchne ke baad use jaane kyon diya ?
 


Sardar car ki battery change karwane gaya ...

Mechanic - Sahab, Exide ki daal doon ?

Sardar - Nahin yaar, dono side ki daal de, warna phir problem hogi.
 
 


A sardar on an interview for the post of detective was asked a question -

Interviewer - Who killed Gandhiji ?

Sardar - Thanks for giving me the job, I will investigate.
 
 

A Sardar was fond of detective novels, he always read from the middle, why ?

Its double interesting. It builds curiosity not only about its end but also

its beginning !
 
 


Sardar returns book to library, bangs it on table & says - What a shit ? "I

read the whole book, too many character, no story at all" ?.

Librarian : So, you are the one who took the Telephone Directory....
 
 


2 Days of Powercut in India made life miserable. Worst affected was Amritsar

where all the SARDARS were stuck for 48 hrs. on Escalaters.....
 
 


Two Sardars are driving a Car, one puts on the indicator and asks the other

to check whether it is working.

He puts his head out and says - YES..NO..YES..NO..YES..NO
 
 
 


Sardarji, tell me ...., what is the meaning of SMS ?

Sardar angrily said, i know -

it means....

S - Sardaron ke

M - Mazak udane ki

S - Service
 
 

Banta : Oye tu har SMS ko do baar kyom bhej raha hai ?

Santa : Kyunki tujhe agar ek forward karna ho to dusra tere paas rahe !!!  tongue3 Winking Winking
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shaiz
Guest
«Reply #53 on: October 26, 2005, 11:45:18 AM »
This is called height of confusion....

Enjoy this terrific confusion .....

Telephone conversation between William Knott and Mr Watt :
................................................. ........

"Who's calling?" was the answer to the telephone.
"Watt."
"What is your name, please?"
"Watt's my name."
"That's what I asked you. What's your name?"
"That's what I told you. Watt's my name."
A long pause, and then from Watt, "Is this James Brown?"
"No, this is Knott."
"Please tell me your name."
"Will Knott."
YOU LEFT THE TALKERS AT A POINT WHERE THEY WERE TOTALLY CONFUSED,READ
THE REST OF WHAT HAPPENED...
"Why not?"
"Huh? What do you mean why not?"
"Yeah! Why won't you tell me your name?"
"But I told you my name!"
"Didn't you say you will not?"
"Not not, knott, Will Knott!"
"That's what I mean."
"So you know my name."
"Of course not!"
"Good. So now, what is yours?"
"Watt. Yours?"
"Your name!"
"Watt's my name."
"How the hell do I know? I am asking you!"
"Look I have been very patient and I have told you my name and you
have
not even told me yours yet.."
"You have been patient, what about me?"
"I have told you my name so many times and it is u who have not told
me
yours yet."
"Of course not!"
"See, you even know my name!"
"Of course not!"
"Then why do you keep saying of course Knott?"
"Because I don't."
[Pause]
"What is your name?"
"See, you know my name!"
"Of course not!"
"Then why do you keep saying Watt is your name"
"To find out your name!"
"But you already know it!"
"What?"
"See, and you know mine!"
"Of course not!"
"Exactly!"
NOW THEY ARE AT A POINT WHERE BOTH THINK THE OTHER KNOWS THEIR NAME,
BUT THEY THEMSELVES DON'T KNOW THE OTHER'S NAME.
"Listen, listen, wait; if I asked you what your name is, what will be
your
answer?"
"Watt's my name."
"No, no, give me only one word."
"Watt"
"Your name!"
"Right!"
[Pause before it hits him]
"Oh, Wright!"
"Yeah!"
"So why didn't you say it before?"
"I told you so many times!"
"You never said Wright before"
"Of course I did."
"Ok I won't argue any more. Do you know my name?"
"I do not."
"Well, there you go, now we know each other's name."
"I do not!"
"Good!"
[Pause before it hits him]
"Oh, Guud!"
"Good."
"No wonder, it took me so long, is that Dutch?"
"No, it's Knott!"
"Oh, okay. At least the names are clear now Guud."
"Yes Wright."

 
Winking
Logged
shaiz
Guest
«Reply #54 on: October 27, 2005, 11:28:28 AM »
4 Easy Questions



 

The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and it will tell you whether you are qualified to be a professional. Scroll down for each answer. The questions are NOT that difficult.

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Did you say, "Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator?" (Wrong Answer)

Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory. OK, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your true abilities.

4. There is a river you must cross but it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it?




 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Correct Answer: You swim across. All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.

According to Anderson Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong. But many preschoolers got several correct answers.

Anderson Consulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most professionals have the brains of a four year old.
Winking
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shaiz
Guest
«Reply #55 on: October 27, 2005, 11:36:05 AM »
Deadly PJs....Commit suicide at your own risk...
One










3 + 3 =8
Bataaon Kaise?
















Bataaon Bataaon!














Nahi Pata?!!














Are
Galatise!!!!!!!!!!!



zindegi ek paheli hai...
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scroll karne se solve nahi hogi.... [IMAGE]




Teacher: 'A' for?
Student: Apple !!!
Teacher: Jor se bolo
Student: JAI MATA DI



What's the opposite of "Dominoes"???

think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think
think

tired of thinking???

Well the answer is "Domi doesn't know"[IMAGE]


Whats the opposite of "Pizza Hut"







...
















....













.....

okei don't kill me "Pizza Hutna math"



ok whats the opp of venky's..


































venlocks...
(now,now,dont bang urhead plz..)








Whats the opposite of Gopalakrishnan?

Comepalakrishnan.


What is the opposite of Subramnium Swamy?

Subramanium Didn't See Me.










A guy phones up his Boss, but gets the bosses' wife instead.

"I'm afraid he died last week." she explains.

The next day the man calls again and asks for the boss.

"I told you" the wife replies, "he died last week."

The next day he calls again and once more asks to Speak to his boss.

By this time the wife is getting upset and shouts, "I'VE ALREADY TOLD
YOU TWICE, MY HUSBAND, YOUR BOSS, DIED LAST WEEK!

WHY DO YOU KEEP CALLING?"

"Coz," he replied laughing, "I just love hearing it..."






A guy is traveling in a deluxe car in the desert. He wants to take a bath, but he hasn't got a soap and there is no water anywhere around...

what can he do?









->>He will integrate his d-lux car to get Lux + c (constant of integration) Using the lux soap he will take bath in the 'c'.

one day a man calls his wife from his IDEA mobile
his call gets cross connected to some other lady.They still keep on talking..they start liking each other..and finally they get married.
what MORAL do u get???
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An IDEA can change your wife.






A sardarji went to a STD/ISD/PCO SHOP and slapped the operator twice.


:-(

Guess why ?











because there it was written "Number dial karne se pehele do lagae"



a sardar goes to movie with 17 sardars
why?Huh?Huh?Huh?Huh?














coz it was an adult movie n below 18 were not allowed



how do u place a camel in a fridge in three steps??
...
...
1.open the fridge
2.keep the camel inside it
3.close the fridge
next one
>>
hoe do u place an elephant in the fridge in 4 steps??
..
...
..
1.open fridge 2.take the camel out
3.place the elephant inside
4.close the door


there was a jungle meeting. all the animals were required to report. all of them turned out, except one. who was it and why??


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.the elephant... u put it in the refridgerator, remember Huh? [IMAGE]


now u have to cross a river which ios inhabited by deadly crocodiles...but any way u have to cross that river ...how will u cross that ?
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it simple ...as all animals are attending the meeting ...so no crocodiles are there..so u can cross easily...

Okay in the jungle meeting where all the animals reported, they were welcomed with gutkha.....only one animal requested for a particular brand. which animal and which brand?








Ans: the animal is giraffe and he opted for "Manikchand" (Unche log unchi pasand !!!)


suppose u need 2 transport all the things in urhouse 4 relocating..suppose u go by aircraft ... it is losing height and pilot asks u throw something away to reduce load...what is the thing u will throw away to reduce the load??
...
...
the elephant in the fridge!!!!!!!!

two persons r talkin by the swimming pool...one says he wont swim bcoz he is afraid of dying bcoz of drowning.....the other one says ....hey dont be afraid..i'll show u how 2 swim and he dives in the pool n starts swimming....
suddenly, the man outside the pool dies...
........
...........
guess why?Huh?Huh??
..........
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the elephant falls on him.......
.......
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ok enough time pass one final Q

ek haathi agar swimming pool mein gir gaya
to kaise bahar nikalega?Huh?Huh?
........
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think
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think....
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geela ho ke nikalega......




ek aadmi marne vala hei to use kya khilaoge ........

sweets nops
















sault nopes













think













think





















are yaar
birla white cement
kyunki iske ander jaan hei.......[IMAGE]





whats difference between a man jumping from 1st floor and a man jumping from 10th floor?
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former goes (hit) aaaaaaaaa
later goes aaaaaaaaa (hit)



Other than being fruits, what is common between an Apple and an Orange?


think......
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socho socho
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the answer is ..........
They Both Are Not a Banana !! Winking
Logged
shaiz
Guest
«Reply #56 on: October 27, 2005, 11:45:04 AM »
Once Banta Singh attended an Interview.
Interviewer : Give me the opposite words.
Banta Singh : Ok
Interviewer : Made in India
Banta Singh : Destroyed in Pakistan
Interviewer : Keep it Up
Banta Singh : Put it Down
Interviewer : Maxi Mum
Banta Singh : Mini Dad
Interviewer : Enough! Take your Seat
Banta Singh : Don't take my seat
Interviewer : Idiot! Take your Seat
Banta Singh : Clever! Don't take my Seat
Interviewer : I say you get out!
Banta Singh : You didn't say I come in
Interviewer : I reject you!
Banta Singh : You Appoint me
Interviewer: ........!!!!!!!
======================
Santa: What is another difference between a mosquito
and a fly?
Banta: A fly can fly but a mosquito cannot mosquito.
======================
Banta: When did George Washington die?
Santa: two days before his funeral.
=======================
Banta: Tell me five FEROCIOUS animals you can think
of........
Santa: 3 Lions and 2 Tigers.
======================
Banta Singh was in court charged with parking his car
in a restricted area. The Judge askd him if he had
anything to say in his defence. "They should not put
up such misleading notices", said Banta. "It said,
FINE FOR PARKING HERE"
======================
Santa Singh and Banta Singh were always boasting of
their parents achievements to each other.
Santa Singh : Have you ever heard of the Suez Canal?
Banta Singh : Yes I have.
Santa Singh : Well, my father dug it.
Banta Singh : That's nothing, have you ever heard of
Dead Sea?
Santa Singh : Yes I have.
Banta Singh : Well, my father killed it. Winking
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shaiz
Guest
«Reply #57 on: November 05, 2005, 06:40:33 PM »
K;) :pL    LOGIC




1. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

2. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

3. If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

4. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from     Holland called Holes?

5. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

6. Why the man who invests all your money called a broker?

7. If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make
   terrible?

8. Why is it called building when it is already built?

9. If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

10.If you're not supposed to drink and drive, then why do bars        have parking lots?

11.If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several    times, does he become disoriented?

12. If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?? Humans Huh?


13. If working hours are meant for working, then why are you      reading this??? :p Winking
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shaiz
Guest
«Reply #58 on: November 10, 2005, 05:28:29 AM »


A good poem that I read and thought of sharing with u all, something to learn from...hope you appreciate:

Today, upon a bus, I saw a very beautiful woman and wished I were as beautiful.

When suddenly she rose to leave, I saw her hobble down the aisle.

She had one leg and wore a crutch.

But as she passed, she passed a smile.

Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.

I have two legs; the world is mine.

 

I stopped to buy some candy.

The lad who sold it had such charm.

I talked with him, he seemed so glad.

If I were late, it'd do no harm.

And as I left, he said to me,

I thank you; you've been so kind.

It's nice to talk with folks like you.

You see," he said, "I'm blind."

Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.

I have two eyes; the world is mine.

 

Later while walking down the street I saw a child I knew.

He stood and watched the others play but he did not know what to do.

I stopped a moment and then I said, "Why don't you join them dear?"

He looked ahead without a word.

I forgot, he couldn't hear.

Oh, God, forgive me when I whine.

I have two ears; the world is mine.

 

With feet to take me where I'd go,

With eyes to see the sunset's glow,

With ears to hear what I'd know,

Oh, God, forgive me when I whine,

I've been blessed indeed; the world is mine.

 

If this poem makes you feel thankful, just forward it to your friends. After all, it's just a simple

reminder that we have so much to be thankful for!

 
Give the gift of love. It never comes back empty!
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shaiz
Guest
«Reply #59 on: November 10, 2005, 06:48:57 AM »
>Read this true story... and let everybody you know in and around Delhi,especially Gurgaon know this.......>>My friend lives in Rohini... One day he went to Gurgaon to visit his uncle for some days. One evening he and some other of my college friendswent to Priya's for a movie. He had so much fun that he forgot that itwas very late. He reached Gurgaon around midnight......>>He had to walk about a mile from where his friend dropped him.... As he>>was walking alone, he could sense that the night felt very creepy as it>>was so dark. While walking, he was astonished to see an old creepy >>looking guy selling some books. It was a very unusual thing to see a>>thing like that..... It got the shivers on him when he noticed>>that his old guy is unusually pale and staring at him... >>The old guy said "Son why don't you get a book...it would keep you>>company". Then he did something which he would regret for the rest of>>his life ......... My friend started to act brave & thought why not >>& had a look at his collection.. he>>noticed that all the books were related to supernatural>>activities...but he found one that was very interesting. So he>>asked the old man "how much >>is it?".... The old guy replied, "Well son...this is an>>interesting book...it's only for Rs 250. ">>>>My friend was shocked and>>said "but...but... >>it's expensive" This time the old man stared which freaked my>>friend. My friend quickly checked all his pockets & found Rs. 200>>& said "This is all>>I hav e." The old guy replied "It's OK son ...you can have the book>>for that price" As ! my friend was just about to run for >>home...the old man called>>back & said "Son ... whatever happen, you don't ever flip the book >>to it's last page... remember these words or you would>>regret it...!!!!!">>My friend nodded and never looked back ... Reaching home...he>>quickly asked his Uncle whether there was any new old book seller >>nearby? The Uncle>>replied "not that I know of but ...we've heard that there's 1 old>>man comes once in a while during full moon nights but heard that>>there is something >>creepy about it...why son?">>My friend freaked out... he told his uncle "nothing uncle...just>>asking". He started reading the book with the old man's words on>>his mind. At>>night, 2 0'clock, as he went to bed, a gush of wind blew which>>chilled him up to his bones. At that glimpse, he noticed the wind>>had blown the pages to its >>last page. He remembered what the old man has said! But we humans>>tend to have the tendency to know. Out of curiosity, he flipped to>>the last page &>>fainted... >>What he saw at the last page is stated below:>>Don't look further down if you have a weak heart I warn you>>..........>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Original price:-- Rs. 20/->>Promotion price:-- Rs. 10/- >>***************************** ***** he he he he hhe hhe>>Don't Start Cursing Me, I felt the Same way on reading this>>Crap.. :wink:  :wink:  :wink:
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